Holy shit, it's been a while. Sorry. I noticed that I forgot the h in the last chapter's title and I think imma just leave it like that because it represents me on a deeper level. I'm sorry its been like 6 months.
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To start off, TRIGGER WARNINGS:
-PTSD attack; like I will go on to say- it is not a completely factual representation and it has been dramatized but still, please be careful, I have managed to trigger myself writing/ reading this back a couple times and so please be warned.
-Implied abuse
-Implied eating disorder
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Can I also say before I start that @ISurvivedNYCNotSpace and @CalmIsOverrated are both amazing friends that I don't deserve. I first interacted with ISurvivedNYCNotSpace about 2-3 years ago and Calm 2 years ago but it was only really the last few months we really started talking a lot. They're kind and funny and CalmIsOverrated even helped me with this chapter. I am so immensely happy to call them my friends and they're so supportive and they make me cry many happy tears at 5 in the morning. Both have been incredibly supportive in the few months we've been talking properly. I can't go a day without talking to them. I really don't deserve them. They've helped me through a lot of shit and dealt with me when i'm tired, A hard job as is. I know calm will cry at this, and good, I want you guys both to know that I don't think I could've done any of this without you. Not even just the writing of the chap. You both mean so much to me and i'm sorry that I can't give you back as much as you've given me. Thank you guys so much. I love you guys.
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DESCRIPTION:
Ok this is a weird concept thing. its a PTSD type thingy around the events with Toomes, but I wanted to add a lil edge to it. It'll hopefully make sense when you read it, but basically, Liz and peter ended up friends cuz peter do be gay. there is more time between the decathlon championship thing and the dance. say like a couple months. and Pete and Liz hang out a lot at her house. the whole time Toomes and peter know each others identities but there is no building thing yet. In the months before Toomes raids Tony's plane, he abuses Pete physically and emotionally when Liz isn't there. Sorry just wanted a bit more depth to it. the building does fall on Peter though and the whole attacking the plane thing happens but there's more time before that basically. Also, Ned didn't help with the stopping vulture thing. Also they got over civil war, cuz yeah. I somehow just made Tony a dick and I think imma just leave it there so yeah. Get ready for angst because I keep slowly coming back to this chapter and adding bits and pieces and apparently almost every single time I felt like writing angst.
Also, with the PTSD attack right at the beginning, i'm aware you don't relive every single memory all at once- or at least the ones I have it's only one memory related to the trigger. I'm only using this to establish that there have been a bunch of incidents and show some of the things that have happened in a short amount of time. This is a dramatic interpretation.
Enjoy.
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Peter's POV:
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"BYE PETEY!" Liz called across the canteen. Two small words. Why that word?
The world around me was a blur of noises and lights. I couldn't focus. I was there again. The screaming, the glass shattering, the words on repeat like an earworm. I couldn't do anything why didn't I do anything. my chest tightened. his voice. their voices. "I wanted you to be better" "aw, that's cute, you're scared? good." "You must be Peter" "you like that, don't you Petey?" "you should have run the day you met me" "c'mon Petey, you know the rules' 'thank you for beating me sir' 'good boy Petey" "don't you ever, EVER interfere with my business again. Because if you do, I'll kill you and everybody you love." "oh you messed with the wrong man Petey" "NO ONE FUCKING LOVES YOU. GET THAT IN YOUR THICK SKULL AND JUST FUCKING LET GO" "That thing hasn't even touched me yet' 'True, then again, wasn't really trying to" "If you're nothing without this suit, then you shouldn't have it" The world around me folded in on itself as memories flooded through my brain. The building was falling. i'm trapped. anyone, i'm here, i'm trapped. HELP ME, ANYONE IM DOWN HERE. PLEASE. please. i'm trapped. i'm..... alone.
