chapter 13
"'cause every day, it's gettin' colder
and if only I could hold you
you'd keep my head from goin' under"-Lewis Capaldi
Lyra was almost 100% sure that she had blacked out and was still in shock. She didn't even remember making her way back up to the Gryffindor common room but she must have because suddenly she was in front of her dorm room.
Fay was waiting for her in her own bed, reading when Lyra walked in and looked up at her with a raised eyebrow, "I thought you said two hours. What happened?"
She said it teasingly, like she was expecting Lyra to respond with a joke at Blaise's or her own expense. If it had been a normal meet up with him, she probably would have. And that's when it hit her.
She slowly walked to her own bed, dropping onto it. She wasn't crying, why wasn't she crying?
"Hey, you alright?" Fay had the worried look on her face from whenever Lyra would space out really bad.
The words clogged in her throat, "He... I--"
Lye felt the bed dipping next to her as Fay sat beside her. "What happened?"
"He... broke up with--," Her chest felt awfully tight as the words were choked out of her.
Fay didn't speak for a while, really she kind of hoped that Zara would magically show up because Fay loved Lyra, but she did not know how to deal with heartbreak for the life of her.
Still she sucked in a breath and carefully wrapped an arm around her in a one shouldered hug, hoping it was enough to comfort Lyra to some extent. But Lyra hadn't reacted at all, she continued to stare off at the blue curtains that surrounded her bed.
"...Are you ok?"
"I think so," She really wasn't sure, "I feel like I'm supposed to be crying... But I don't feel anything."
Fay didn't respond, keeping an arm around Lyra, who let out a cold, humorless chuckle, "Maybe I've finally run out of emotions. Maybe Bellatrix snuffed it all out of me."
"Hey, don't go there." Fay said, she thinks this is what Zara would have done, "You just need time to... process?"
Lyra chuckled again, slightly less cold, "No offense, but you are no good at this."
"I know, mate. I really wish Zara was rooming with us because I have no idea what to do."
Lyra grabbed at her hand instead of answering, intertwining her fingers with Fay's and resting her head on her shoulder. "Just stay with me for a while?"
Fay nodded, her chin bumping softly against the crown of Lyra's head. The position was slightly uncomfortable for her, both arms were around Lyra as she held one hand and wrapped the other around her shoulder. But she stayed as still as possible, hoping Lyra could find the slightest comfort.
It didn't work as much as she hoped it would.
Lyra hadn't slept at all that night, at one point she remembered letting go of Fay and telling her to get some sleep, promising she would too.
Instead she had pulled her curtains shut, staring blankly and the deep blue, almost black material. When Fay had pulled her curtains back the next morning, Lyra squinted as a ray of sun hit her square in the eyes.
"Did you sleep at all?" Fay asked when she saw her sitting with her legs crossed in the same position she had left her in.
"Yeah," Lyra lied easily, still unable to bring herself to feel. She knew the break up had happened, that was for sure, but why didn't she want to cry or be angry or anything.
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II. roman holiday | blaise zabini
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