song for chapter:
out of love - alessia cara
[highly recommended + put on repeat]december 4th, 5:36 pm {saturday}
akaashi and kuroo sat in the car, akaashi in the passenger seat staring at the window, kuroo on his phone.
akaashi noticed that kuroo had been acting weird lately, saying he was busy more often, and that he couldn't hangout after school anymore.
akaashi wasn't the type to be bothered by these types of things, so he brushed it off and thought nothing of it.
"do you want to eat somewhere or?" akaashi asked awkwardly, not knowing what they were doing in the car.
"oh, change of plans. could i drop you home? i have to go somewhere for my dad." kuroo said with no emotion.
"sure..." was all akaashi could say, he couldn't think of anything else.
it was a 7 minute drive. the soft turned down radio playing in the background, they didn't say anything else to each other.
once akaashi stepped out the car, and closed the door shut kuroo took off. akaashi sighed, not wanting another thing to stress out about. akaashi unlocked his door, slipping his shoes off as he set his bag down on the kitchen stool.
he immediately went straight to his room, walking up to the second floor. he walked past the master bedroom and the first bathroom to his room on the right.
he closed the door behind him, tossing himself onto his messy bed, closing his eyes. he pulled the covers over him, covering half his body as he laid on his stomach.
he turned over, laying on his back. his eyes opened again, staring up at the ceiling. he began thinking about the relationship he had with kuroo.
dating for almost 4 months, so much has changed now that he thought about it. he remembered when they first made it official, kuroo asked him if they could keep their relationship a secret until he was ready to tell everyone.
akaashi promised, and thought nothing of it.
he remembered their firsts, their first night together, their first date, their first kiss.
he remembered the way he used to look at akaashi. he remembered the way it felt when kuroo would kiss him.
he remembered how kuroo would listen to akaashi when he talked about how his day went, making eye contact with him whenever he talked.
akaashi softly laughed remembering how clingy kuroo used to be whenever they were finally alone.
he remembered the times they had to sneak around the school to hug or kiss so no one would see them. he remembered their make out session in the janitors closet after lunch when they were supposed to be in 5th period.
he remembered how gentle kuroo was when it was akaashi's first time.
he remembered the little things kuroo did. calling akaashi to make sure he was home safe. playing with his hair for hours, causing akaashi to fall asleep. laying in kuroo's lap as he played video games.
but it wasn't like that anymore, it wasn't the same.
kuroo slowly stopped looking him in the eye as akaashi talked.
he stopped being clingy, wanting space.
the kisses didn't feel the same, they felt forced.
the half smile kuroo gave akaashi now wasn't the same as his full smile he gave whenever akaashi would look at him.
he noticed how kuroo was always focused on his phone, his eyes glued to it.
he noticed how he wouldn't let him look at his phone anymore, he began to be secretive towards akaashi.
akaashi just now realized how one sided their relationship was turning. he was too blind to see kuroo falling out of love.
a tear slipped from akaashi's eye
maybe akaashi didn't want to realize it until now. maybe he didn't want to let kuroo go just yet. he loves him.
maybe he wanted to keep this dumb act up for a little more.
he didn't want to think about them anymore, deciding he wasn't gonna say anything to kuroo.
—
december 16th, 2:12 pm {after school}
kuroo stayed home because he got sick from the day before. akaashi decided to bring him treats from their local bakery.
akaashi drove out of his school campus, passing his neighborhood going straight to the bakery.
waiting at a red light, akaashi tapped his left fingers on the wheel waiting for it to turn green.
once the light finally turned green, akaashi placed his foot back on the gas pedal. he was about a couple of blocks away from the bakery.
he finally pulled into the parking lot, finding the nearest empty parking spot. he took his keys out of the engine and closed his door shut, walking into the bakery.
he decided to order 3 blueberry muffins + 2 chocolate chip cookies.
he paid and thanked the cashier, holding the brown bag of sweets in his left arm.
he shoved his phone into his right pant pocket, paying attention to what was in front of him.
he then noticed a familiar looking car, him being curious he started to look around
he got closer to the car, looking behind it.
there he saw kuroo kissing kenma. kenma's back against the car, kuroo had his arms wrapped around his waist leaning towards him. he saw the way kuroo smiled into the kiss.
akaashi just froze, his lips slightly parted. he had no words to say.
kuroo's eyes still closed, he pulled kenma into a hug. his arms wrapped around kenma's neck tightly.
kuroo opened his eyes, seeing akaashi in front of him.
kuroo's eyes widen, his lips stayed closed. he didn't say a word to akaashi.
akaashi's expression stayed the same, waiting to hear what kuroo would say.
kuroo slowly shook his head, his lips pressed against each other. his eyes begging akaashi to not say a word, kenma still in his arms.
akaashi hesitated
but, he saw the way kuroo kissed kenma, the smile he had on his face. he saw the way he hugged him, the way his arms wrapped around him so tightly.
he saw the love he gave kenma.
akaashi stood there and looked at the ground, waiting for himself to make a decision.
kuroo's eyes stayed the same, worried what would happen next.
akaashi hesitantly looked back up at kuroo, making eye contact with him.
akaashi slowly nodded, his eyes began to water. he gave kuroo a small smile before turning around, walking away.
a tear slowly slid down akaashi's cheek.
+++
yes i actually hesitated writing the last couple parts bc it kinda hurt💔
i was thinking of ships i wanted to do for this, and kuroaka first came into mind LMAO
anyways, thank you if you read all the way through <333
-mae xoxo
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