𝐒𝐮𝐠𝐚𝐫 (Sugawara x reader)

‿̩͙‿̩̩̥͙̽‿̩͙ 𝙜𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙚𝙣𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝‿̩̥̩‿̩̩̥͙̽‿̩͙

-: ✧ :- prompt - essentially school sucks and causes adolescents stress, anxiety, and Depression. I've been feeling super overwhelmed with school so here's some comfort -: ✧ :-

-: ✧ :- notes - might be triggering to some people so like Idk, read if you want lol -: ✧ :-

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Fucking fuck

 I look at the illuminated laptop screen, my grades in plain view making me want to just scream. I had been trying my best to keep up with my honor classes and it just wasn't working. I can feel my fist tighten, my nails digging into the rough skin of my palm.  I'm not sure how long I just stared at the collection of D's and F's. my jaw clenched as I slammed my hands on my desk as I aggressively stood up. my hands stung from the indents of my fingernails. at first, I was just angry and now... I felt like such a failure. why couldn't I do better? I was doing so good and just fucked it up for me, didn't I? I lean against my door, my body sliding down. I pull my knees in and put my head down. I can feel hot tears stream down my face. why am I such a failure? this is all my fault. my grades were dropping, my arguments with my parents had become more frequent and even more hurtful than before. even my relationships with my friends had become more and more tiring to maintain.  

 I wipe away my tears but more just seem to pour out. I begin to breakdown more. everyone's just disappointed me. I can't do anything right. I start digging at myself more and more, all my mistakes slowly coming out, every action soon was criticized, and couldn't help but just agree. Soon my quiet sobs turn into rough, jagged breathing and hot tears. I'm pathetic, if I actually care I would've done better, I would've been better. the silence was interrupted by the sweet jingle of my phone. I get up to check my phone, wanting to hang up immodestly. that was until I read out the contact name. Suga. I considered answering, he always seemed to make me smile, maybe it would help to talk to him? you'd just bother him with your problems. I grab my phone, swiping to decline the call. a little part of me regretting hanging up. it's for the better, I mean who actually wants to hear you anyway? before I could even set my phone back down it rang again. Suga was calling me again. I decline it again, not wanting to bother him with my dumb problems.  soon it became multiple messages and more calls from him. finally, after ten messages and calls asking me to pick up, I did.  "h-hello?" my voice was hoarse and quiet. I heard him sigh before speaking "thank god you answered I was getting really worried."

"you were worried?" I asked, I couldn't really believe him. why would he of all people be worried about me?

"of course I was, you seemed really upset earlier," he said sweetly. I stayed silent, trying my best to not breakdown. 

"anyway I'm outside, can you open the door?" he was here? I look horrible and he's here? 

"i- um okay," I say awkwardly before hanging up. I bite the inside of my cheek while heading to the front door. I open it softly, not sure what to expect. 

 I felt him hug me tightly, his arms holding me tightly. I try to blink away my tears. "I don't know what happing with you right now... but just know I'm here for you. Okay?" I couldn't keep in my tears anymore. they streamed down more. his grip on me had loosened as he pulls back. his taller figure stared at me before wiping my tears, his expression was warm and welcoming. it only made me cry more. his hands reached my face, he gently held my face, his thumb rubbing my cheek softly. 'It's gonna be okay' he began to repeatedly whisper. soon I broke down. all the pent up emotions had finally been let out. my frustrations, my sadness my disappointment with myself had finally gotten a chance to be heard. he held me the entire time. it was nice. I felt loved. he held me for a while, he swayed left and right, rocking me softly.

 Soon my panic had calmed down, I still felt horrible but at least I was just a little calmer. Suga made some dinner, warm home cooked food is what I needed the most right now anyway. soon enough I felt drained and tired. I'm not sure when but I had fallen asleep and soon woke up in the setters arms, a blanket draped over us. he looked asleep, his beautiful brown eyes closed, he looked as always. I snuggled closer into his side, he was radiating warmth. I still felt disappointed in myself but Suga made that feel like a distant memory. something compelled me to say those dreaded 3 words. I love had spilled out of my mouth so quietly. it seemed almost natural to love the gray-haired boy. 

"I love you too."

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993 words

sorry if it took a while for me to write a new one-shot, I should be able to write a little more over winter break and hopefully, I can write a few holiday one-shots. also ill probably write a few angst, specifically one inspired and based on a song written by Leanna firestone, she writes a bunch of songs for anime characters and she wrote "cheating Y/N x Suga" so you'll probably get that soon! (^_^)

lots of love,

                                                        M.R.