Temper.

1.

I don't know what it was I was expecting, but I don't think it was this. I thought I could just get over what happened, I mean I knew that I would grieve but I didn't know that my mind would do a hard reset and change my perspective on everything. I thought I had it under control.... guess not.

This world makes it seem like tragic accidents are odder than a building getting blown up by thieves that can turn their arms into guns and can jump from building to building without breaking a sweat. But the reality to this world is you can have a quirk and still be subjected to one of life's many cruel realities. Death is inevitable. No matter how strong you are, how fast are you are, or how amazing your quirk is. Everyone, including the infamous hero All Might himself, is put into the basket of life.

When my parents died, I started to look at quirks, 'heroes' and "villans" differently. I suppose some people would refer to me as a "vigilante".  However, I'm not too hung up on giving myself a title unless I'm committed to it. This leads me to the question I've been asking myself...

'Do I even want to be a hero?'

I'm not saying I want to be a criminal but.. Do I want to be given the title "hero"?To me, heroes (some not all) in this society are more focused on their financial gain, status, popularity, titles, etc. Meaning their goals in life for being a "hero" isn't exactly "hero-like".

 I don't believe some people that have quirk should be heroes, because some just abuse that power completely. A "hero" should be judged on who a person is and what they want to do for society, not just because they have an "okay" quirk. Because this world is 80% quirk, almost everyone who's had dreams of becoming a hero wants to become one. However, you can't have too many heroes because then there won't be a society to save. In that same stance, while you're are trying to wield out the "strong heroes" you turn away from potentials. Then some of these "heroes" grow up to be privileged criminals, doing whatever they want.

Then you have the people society has labeled as "villains". I'm not saying "if you catch a criminal trying to rob a store or committing a felony to sit down with them and talk it out". But what I am saying is that some of these "villains" just weren't given the same opportunities as some of these "heroes". Yes, what they do may be wrong but there are other real-life problems that they are facing that can't be solved by a parent or guardian. Some of these "villains" didn't choose this life but were forced into it. Some of them were even pushed because they saw a "hero" using their privilege to get what they want, and so they rebelled. Some villains have good intentions but can't execute them properly because they don't have the resources or were turned away so they did things the only way they knew how to.

Quirks can range from being minuscule printers to have a powerful quirk like All Might, there can even be people with multiple quirks. Most, if not all quirks can be used as a weapon or considered dangerous at any given time. We that have powerful quirks are more susceptible to becoming a "threat" if the quirk is not used responsibly. Then some laws prevent us from using our quirks in public, even sometimes in crimes that are being committed. I've always found that law .. the dumbest shit I've ever heard. So ... if I see someone about to get injured I'm supposed to skip down the street and wait for a hero that may not even be there? Ridiculous.

There are so many factors that come with having a quirk in society and for someone like me who doesn't know what to do... I must choose my decision wisely. Don't get me wrong, the thought of  saving someone and making people feel safe seems like a good life to live . However, I don't want someone breathing down my throat telling me what to and not to do with my quirk. I don't want to be under a telescope because I just so happened to have a quirk. However, I don't find pleasure in hurting the innocent either. The guilty, the justified persecuted... that's a different story. Then there's that connotation, "heroes don't kill". A naive thought to have when you're a child still wrapped in the swaddles of youthful innocence. But when face the reality where some villains won't hesitate to rob, assault or brutally murder you just for their own satisfaction. I'm a firm believer in  defending yourself no matter the repercussions, because if ever put in a situation. If ever I needed to make the choice between the death pf my assailant or the purity of my hero name, I'd gladly be sullied with the title of villain.

All these incessant thoughts swarm my head daily and the question remains...

'Do I even want to be a hero?'