Can You Forgive Me?

Dec was sat in his idling car, delaying the inevitable. To put it simply, he was terrified. He was scared of the series of events that would knowingly unfold when he stepped through the front door of the house.

Haven't you gone in yet? I can see you from here...

Dec glanced at his phone as it buzzed in the cup holder. He rolled his eyes at his wife, before picking up his phone, intending to reply when another text came through from her. 

Look, it's Ant. Your best friend. Yes, he fucked up, but he needs you now. He messaged you, inviting you round and you were so happy last night. What's changed within twelve hours? 

Dec scowled. Nothing had changed. He was still happy to see him, but he knew it wouldn't be the most easiest meet up in the world. He groaned and pressed his hands in his eyes, before taking a deep breath and composing himself. He was thankful there were no paps, they would have a field day with the fact that he couldn't even climb from his own car and  walk a couple of yards to see his best friend.

Glancing up at the house, Dec sighed determinedly and opened the drivers door, climbing from the car. Looking up at the house, he tried to banish the thoughts of the last time he was there. Shaking his head, he slammed the door and headed round the front of the car to head up the steps to the house, before stopping to compose himself. His hand hovered over the door-handle, fighting the urge to turn around and run. He didn't think he was ready to have the conversation they both desperately needed to have. His phone buzzed again and he was guiltily grateful for the distraction.

Stop putting it off. Rip the band-aid off and talk. You're not coming back home until you talk. The door will be locked and the chain is on. So, don't even try it. 

Dec scowled, his fingers rushing over the keypad. 

Stop staring at me through the window. It's creepy! 

He pocketed his phone and took a deep breath, pressing down on the handle, feeling it go slack under his grip. Pushing the door open, he stepped inside, shutting the door behind him and locking it. Toeing off his shoes and putting them under the hallway table, he slowly straightened up. Listening out, he could tell his best friend was in the kitchen, because he could hear the clinging of the spoon in the mugs of tea that Ant had no doubt prepared for them both. 

Edging slowly to kitchen, he stopped just before he turned the corner. Fear took a hold of him, his hands shaking. He was terrified of who he was going to see. Would it be the Ant that has stared back at him for months, or would it be his Ant? He steeled himself before slowly edging forwards into the kitchen. White cabinets came into view, then the black marbled kitchen island and then eventually Ant, who was tapping away on his phone furiously, freezing the second Dec came into his eyeline.

The silence was deafening. Ant locked his phone and shoved it away, standing tall as he watched his best friend. He watched as Dec edged into the kitchen fully, but not moving any further than the threshold. He wondered which one of them was going to break the silence. His eyes dragged over his best friends form, a small frown contorting onto his face. Dec looked like he hadn't slept right in weeks, a light smattering of stubble round his jaw line. Guilt coursed through him, as he knew he would most likely be reason for it. 

''Ant...'' Dec's voice cracked through the air, quiet but shaky, his eyes anywhere but on Ant.

Ant smiled softly, sliding a steaming cup of green tea over to the other side of the kitchen island. ''Hey, Dec.'' he said, gently. He knew better than to ask if he was okay, because it was clear form his body language he wasn't .