Bullied;Nash Grier

3

So basically I kinda realized carter had told all the boys I was in cams room shirtless so me and cam decide to take it easy I get my shirt on and cam just walks around shirtless. "I should go carter saw... Amd knowing Nash I'll be called a slut" I say
"Nick don't go" cam says
"Nicole" I say "I hate when people say nick"I add
"Sorry , Nicole don't go"
"Cam I live 4 houses away" I say laughing
"But that's to far"he says
"Bye cam" I say kissing his cheek and walking out
"Slut" I hear Nash says
"Shut the hell up jackass" I say giving him the finger and walking out of their house.I walk to my house and do my homework. I decide to look at twitter ... Wow my feed is very active.never mind it's all hate.
The hate comments
~ kys
~ew ur fat
~why can't u be better ugly slut
~ ur gross
More...
Geez why can't I live a hate free life... Jkjk that will never .I just want to feel loved that's all. I really like cam but I sense something fishy but what ever. As much as I try to stay strong and show them that I'm hard to break , I'm already broken and I honestly do think I'm fat , I do think I'm stupid , I do think I'm ugly , I do think I'm pathetic, and I do want to kill myself. I come off as strong because when someone's rude to me I say shut up or just walk away, I do that because I'm afraid of being called week . That's the worst. And I just want to be normal. I here my mom come in the house . She comes in my room like usual.
"Hey , lazy ass, why don't u get off ur fucking phone and do something for the house ,maybe like clean it the hell up because the only reason it's dirty is because u live In it, or u can leave this fucking house "my mom says
"K" I say making a hand motion to get out
"Are u even listening to me u fat dirty rotten skunk bag "she says
"Get out" I say
"Excuse me , u better shut ur mouth before u shut it for u" she yells
"Mom , may u please leave the premises"I say and I feel a sharp pain in my right cheek
"What the fuck mom why the hell did u slap me " I say
"You don't deserve a family" she says
"U gave birth to me" I say
"Yeah , worst mistake ever" she shouts
"Mom get the fuck out of my room"I say standing up and pushing her out of the room and locking the door.
"Don't make me kick u out like I kicked your brother out 3 years ago" she yells banging on the door. I opened my closet and reach for my black make up bag , it wasn't a make up bag. It was where I kept my blades. I only cut once , 2 years ago.it was very small and it's basically gone. But this time it won't be small. My eyes are stinging and I feel a salty substance fill my eyes as my face gets sticky and I can see the shadow under my eyes from my mascara. I picked up something wrapped in a bandage , I unraveled it and I see my blade. I ran it across my wrist. And I run to my bathroom. And make another slit in my own skin. And another , and another. 10 min pass and there are more then 20 cuts on my wrist. Covered my whole forearm. I see my own blood swirl in the sink. The dark red partly stained the white sink. As I turned on the water it erased all the evidence in the sink. The only other evidence was on the blade and my own forearm.