The Little of the Alien Commander

Part 16

Even though my eyes were still closed I could tell someone was in the room, I wasn't exactly sure when I had woken up or for that matter when I had even fallen asleep. At least I felt better than I did earlier I no longer had a headache and I felt like it was a lot easier to breathe. It also felt like there was something over my mouth, but it didn't feel like a pacifier. I open my eyes moving my hand to my mouth, wait was there a mask on my face, but why?

"Don't take that off honey you need to have that on right know just try to relax alright." Dr. Bellum said moving my hand away from the mask. 

"What happened?" I asked starting to sit up though she gently pushed me back down.

"Your body wasn't getting oxygen and was getting too much carbon, you need to rest just lay down alright sweetheart."

I look around the room and my heart immideiantly dropped. I didn't get why, I mean I know it was because she wasn't in the room, by I didn't get why that made my heart drop. I didn't even know what she was to me at this point.

"Where is she?"

"She's checking the progress of all of the materials getting loading up."

"Oh," I said frowning, I didn't why it made me so upset that she wasn't here, I didn't need her or anything.

"Don't worry sweetheart she should be in a little while, I'm sure at this point she isn't even down there and is in your room organizing everything, she went absolutely overboard with buying you stuff, she feels really bad about not thinking how the air difference would affect you.

"Talking behind my back huh? You know that's a serious offense to talk about a-"

"Oh please instead of saying things that are pointless why don't you play with your little, that will finally give a chance to see the progress of where the things I need are."

I couldn't help but blush when she called me a little, I watched as she sat down on the side of the bed and I laid my head down in her lap. I couldn't help but smile. But then I couldn't help but frown I really wanted to be able to explore.

"Don't worry sweetheart we can go back tomorrow with your bracelt all fixed we won't gave to worry about you not getting enough oxygen. You should be fully back in little space by then too."

But what was the point of being able to see all of the alien stuff if I couldn't understand any of it because I was being forced to be a baby?  I wanted to learn not just see, but that wouldn't happen because babies don't get taught stuff because there too young to understand anything. 

"I don't want to go there's no point," I said moving away from her, I wasn't happy to see her anymore. I may have given up on being able to go home, heck at this point I didn't even really resent them for what they did. I was even fine with acting like a baby to an extent, I mean compared to them I really was, at least by size anyway. What I resented was that by her forcing me to be a baby I was no longer able to do things enjoyed. I couldn't learn, they tried to make sure I walked as little as possible, and I had not any solid food in over a week.

"Sweetheart talk to me if something is wrong-"

"I've already done everything you wanted can you please just leave me alone. I've humiliated myself and giving up my family and friends. I gave up my planet and my pride. But that's not enough for you, you have to have everything, if it intervenes with your fantasy of me being a baby I can't do it, I can't do anything without your approval. So while you have been nothing but nice to me and I appreciate that it doesn't change that. So if you would be so merciful as to leave me alone I would appreciate that. But I guess you would have to leave a baby monitor since Im too little to be trusted." I said moving as far away as I could from her while staying on the bed.

I felt the tears fall down my cheek as I felt her stand up from the bed and leave the room. I had just asked her to leave me alone. So why did I feel so hurt that she did? I had no right to. I curled up into a ball hugging my knees. I was just so sick of everything. So sick of having all of these emotions, so sick of, just sick of everything, at this point I wanted to just have no emotions, it had to be better than constantly switching between them.

I felt a pain in my chest, it wasn't fair that she made me feel happy, it made it so hard to be mad at what she had done to me. All she did was be nice it would have been so much easier if she had been mean. I felt conflicted on one hand I wanted to never be separated, on the other hand, I never wanted to see her again. I maybe I should just stop fighting completely, I felt so much better when I did, but then what did I have left? Would I even be myself at that point?

But I was only having these feelings because of the bracelt. I smiled that wasn't me, of course, I didn't actually like her it was just the bracelet sending signals to my brain- but it wasn't on me it was on the bedside table. That meant I really did enjoy her taking care of me and being treated like a baby to an extent. I liked Dr. Bellum calling me little. Nothing made sense anymore.

"Hey sugar cube I know you don't want me in here but I figured you might be hungry-" I sat up looking at her, she was holding a plate with actual food on it. She had paid attention to what I said.

"Umm-actually could-could I have a bottle?"

"Of course sweetheart I'll go warm you one up right know." She said smiling, and I couldn't help but smile to.

(Oh my gosh I started to tear up while writing this chapter)