Dark Chocolate: A BWWM Story

The Real Reason I Haven't Been Updating Late

Hi everyone, I hope whoever reading this is well and safe.

I wanted to come out and just say why I haven't been updating as much as I should, and why the book was delayed during October.

So, for one I did say one of the reasons was because of my school work, since I'm a freshman in high school this year. My school work has been kind of difficult, there's covid going on, and somethings aren't going as well as they should.

But, that's was only the partial reason I didn't update. This is a little hard to talk about, but I have learned to be open with my feelings and emotions over this time.

So the real reason I didn't update for a while is because of a family issue I went through two months ago.

If you don't know, I am bisexual and I have been my whole life. I was trying to figure out how to tell my parents for a while. So one day I was sitting on my couch, trying to just figure out how to tell them. I have a really good relationship with both parents, so I came up with an idea that I thought would work out. I text my aunt and asked her could she get me a bi flag? She said yes and she was happy for me and congratulated me for me wanting to come out and how I was brave for it. She made me feel accepted and happy for who I was. She order the flag that day, and it came the day after she order it. So during school that morning, I was talking to my friends and texting my cousins. They all supported me and made me feel loved and safe, they were happy for me. I was going to be the first in my friend group to come out to my parents. Near the beginning of school, I text both of my parents and said "love you and I'm sorry for what's going to happen today."

Both were confused and asked me what was going to happen? But, I said it's going to be a surprise. So around algebra, I was walking to take my computer down to the tech room when I get a text from my mom.

She says "I know what your planning today."

My heart was beating fast out of fear, I wasn't sure what to do. But all the pent of emotions came, as I was telling her how she made me feel like I had to question myself, who I was, if I even right or okay. How she made me cry for who I was. But after talking some things out, she understood and she accepted me.

So, that was one parent down. Then my dad was next. After I got home from school, the flag came. It was huge with pink, purple, and blue stripes that flowed. It was beautiful, I almost teared up from the beauty of it. I felt so proud of myself and my mom was telling the places I could put it, or where it would be nice at.

Then later, my mom is doing my hair and putting dreads in for me. My dad comes home and I said "dad, look at my flag." He turns and looks at it.

He says "what is it for?" I said "it's my bisexual flag, it means that I have a sexual attraction to boys and girls." I said with a smile.

I was happy and I thought he'd be happy for me, but I didn't know how wrong I'd be until later.

While my mom and dad were in the room and I went in to talk to them, my mom was on the phone and my dad told me "let's go to your room to talk."

So we go to my room, he sits me down, and talks to me about my flag. I can't remember the whole conversation and frankly, I really don't want to. He said "what if I don't agree with it being in my house, and I beat up {aunt's name} for getting you that flag?"

I said to him "why would it matter, it's my flag in my room, so regardless you don't have to see it everyday." I was being assertive, he was getting angry with my answers and went into my parents room, and started to argue with my mom.

He basically argued with her for nothing, just because she found out before him and thought she wasn't telling him. Even thought, it wasn't my mom's place to tell him. It's my sexual orientation and I'll tell it because it me.