That Twelve Year Old

That Twelve Year Old - Chapter Seven

CHAPTER SEVEN. 30TH AUGUST 2009. FEDORS' ESTATE; OXFORD. 7:30AM.

The next day, I stood in front of the mirror. Slightly scared, about my new school. At least I knew Vanni, right? Then again, he didn't seem to like me very much. I sighed, eyeing my outfit. Making sure none of my scars were on view, for what seemed like the twentieth time.

Just finish already!

I wore a long sleeved shirt, with a baggy white vest on top with a pair of floppy converses designed on it. I threw on the leather jacket (which I growing very fond of), with a black snood.I wore the chain bracelet from Jamie, and a spiky Gothic bracelet (from Zuleyka) on the one of my hands, covering my wrist slits. Zuleyka helped me cover my slap bruise, which started to turn a bit more red. To finish it off, I had on white high-tops and black chinos. I didn't look like an abused freak, did I? I looked normal.

Calm down Clarrisa! You look fine.

I took in a deep breath, to calm myself down; and run a final hand through my hair.

I looked fine. I should, just calm down. No one will know. No one knew back in Stratford; and no one will know here.

Just breath Clarrisa, and go downstairs to eat something. See? You don't have to be hungry today. Just breath. Today is going to be fine, and you look fine too. No one will find out. You're just being paranoid.

Times like these, I was grateful my conscience would take on a motherly role. After another prep talk, I swung on my heel, and walked out of the door, making sure my bedroom was spotless before I did. This time, finding the kitchen wasn't that hard; but still took a long time. When I arrived, I saw everyone on the table.

"Good morning, C!" Josh said, grinning at my presence. I mumbled a 'hi' back, and quietly sat down on a stool.

"We're, like, leaving in, like, three minutes, by the way" Zuleyka said, raising her finger up; looking like a lost meerkat. I chuckled a 'got it' as a response, and found Josh placing a slice of toast in front of me, the butter melting into the brown toasted bread.

Oh. My. God. It's, food... at seven fourty in the damn morning!

I said a thank you to Josh, and carefully ate the toast; trying to keep myself at bay so I don't shove it in my mouth. As soon as placed the bite in my jaw, Zuleyka rushed me out of the house, but slow enough to grab my Mckenzie bag that was placed on hanger when I first got here. I slung the strap, over my shoulder and made my way into the car. Swiping away any crumbs from my face with one hand, and placing a seat belt with the other.

"We're late, we're late, we're late!" Zuleyka said. "It's nearly eight!" She added, her tone expareted.

"It's seven fourty" I said; knowing Amanda said the drive to Pretoria was only a rough five to seven minute ride, and then another five back to Zuleyka's school.

"Oh." She said, her hastiness flying out of the window. "Well, in that case; we're on time!" She said, grinning a bright smile. I was sat in my seat, (again) making sure my back and legs made very minimal contact with any material. My body was so stiff; scared that someone would find out. To occupy myself, I checked to see if there were any old school books in my bag. There was nothing, but scraps of paper. The distraction didn't work though, and I went back to thinking about Pretoria.

No one can know.

All you do, is ruin other people's lives! Like you did to mine, and like you did to my f*cking sister's!

Aunt's voice, spoke through my mind at that moment; and I squeezed my eyes shut (again) trying to ignore her voice.

"Is everything okay back there?" Zuleyka asked, glancing over to me.