BROKEN TILE

CHAPTER THREE

FORTUNE

      I was awake through the previous night due to my keen interest in making my drawing flawless for the oncoming presentation. But that wasn't the reason actually.
I do have traveling insomnia which gets back to normal after a few days of adopting to the new environment. It was over a month I got to CSA but it seemed not to get any better rather it became worse. I only managed to get three hours of sleep in 24 hours and sometimes the highest I could get was five hours. I fought it so many times but I ended up loosing - I gave up. I avoided pills just as Da and Ma had advised but it wasn't easy avoiding it totally. I did everything possible to make sure I rested often due to my inability to sleep well.

I had expected myself to feel dizzy the following day. The classes were boring and I wished I dozed off but sleep seemsed like a mission impossible just like the previous night. I watched absently as everyone left the class after the final lecture. My legs felt too weak to carry my body so I decided to wait for a while, maybe after the rest of the students were out of the class. I had no friends, though I had acquaintances whom I sometimes have a few words with. I love having my space and I appreciated people who understood me, so it was kind of difficult to open up to people who might in turn not accommodate and understand me. My perception about it made me have no friends at all and I sure as hell knew that I was comfortable with it. Speaking of understanding, the only person who does was Fav! My darling twin sister. I missed her so much. I wondered how long it would still take for us to vacate so I can go home to my family.

        After high school I decided to pursue my dreams of being an artist. I purchased the form of my dream school and I sat for the exams and I was so happy I passed. I never wished to be anywhere else than Crestwood School of Art. I couldn't hide my feelings when I was emailed to report to the school with my passport and other documents. I didn't know how to explain or express how I felt rather I noticed how often I smiled and grinned all day. I was too excited I heard myself talking so much about it with Favour the whole day and days after. She was happy for me too.
On the other hand, I was scared of leaving home for the first time without my family most especially Fav. I felt this emptiness when I left home. My first month at CSA was hell. It was so difficult adapting with strangers all around me. I never tried to associate with anyone. I felt left out because I was used to not having anyone around me but my family. Da made sure I had everything I needed and wanted. He ensured that I lived comfortable and had no roommate. The idea made me happy at first but when I arrived to college, I wished I had one, or maybe Fav was also good at what I do.
Leaving an empty room and coming back into the emptiness again everyday sucks, though I enjoyed the privacy.

I managed to walk back to my room after the boring classes I had that very day. I slipped off my shoes and slide into my bed, I lay on my back and looked up the ceiling. I tried to focus on anything that could cross my mind at that point.
I thought about the presentation that would be taking place in no distant time. I tried to figure out what to do with my words in order to explain my paintings. The words were there but I felt nervous whenever I remember I would be standing in front of a crowd. That thought alone worried me. I sensed as sleep creept into my eyes. "Finally." I sighed. I lifted my legs into the bed and I was almost lost into the dream world when my phone rang. I felt happy and grumpy at the same time. Happy because I knew no one else who would call me apart from my family. And grumpy because I needed the sleep that was calling that moment. I smiled and felt the sleep vanish from my eyes when I saw who was calling. Fav!
"Girl you can't believe what happened." She screamed through the phone.
I can't help but giggle at the sound of her voice piercing into my ear drum. Fav was the happiest person I had ever met. She got that from Ma. They both have the loudest laughter in the house. Anytime I saw her calling, I always get excited because of her happy moods; her voice alone changes my sad moods. She always found a way to cheer me up.
"First, my book has been published!" She screamed again and I'm sure she leaped.
"Waow" I heard myself shout. I wanted to say more but I was too happy to let out another word. Damn! I found myself so happy that I remembered I hadn't felt like that since I arrived CSA.