Look, I know this is gonna sound kinda stupid, but...
I...
okay, uh...
do you ever just...have those kinds of thoughts...where you wonder what would happen if you...left school?
Like if you asked to go to the bathroom during 2nd period and just...walked out? If I told Mom and Dad if I was going to hang out with people and then didn't (like I went to the park to sit alone for three hours or something), would anyone notice?
Sometimes I'll just be sitting in class and wonder what would happen if I did. Leave, I mean. I'm, like, 1,000% sure most people here wouldn't notice I left. There's a 70% change everyone from the club would notice eventually. Harrison definitely would. Maybe Harper and Taylor at lunch.
And oh my God, I didn't think there was a way to feel so sad, but...just, thinking about it...it hurts.
And what's worse is that I know I'm not alone in this. Feeling like this, I mean. One good search online tells me that. People feeling so alone even though they're surrounded by other people. But I still feel...fuck, I don't even have the words to describe it. It's like "ALONE SADNESS" or some shit like that. I don't know what to call it.
I just
Like...
I wanna believe that things'll get better like Rory says. But a part of me says that things'll just keep getting worse and I can't stop myself from thinking it because it's just so fucking easy to think it.
God, I wanna tell someone about all...this. Dad, Owen, Harrison, anyone. Fucking Paige, even. But I feel like it's just me being stupid because the answer's probably right in front of me and I can't see it. And some of them probably would understand me, right? Maybe not Dad, but the other people.
...maybe I'm just being dumb.
I mean, I'm not even smart enough to even get a fucking soccer scholarship for college.
Sorry for ranting.
Sorry.
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When The Rain Stops (BXB)
Teen Fiction[ A VERY Slow-Burn, Coming-of-Age LGBT+ Love Story about the Messiness of Love and Life ] Jackson Rivera hates Rory Harwood with all his guts. He's has been the scourge of Jackson's summer for years, and he doesn't know why. That is, until he finds...
