Deadly Living: Fear is Just A Word - Book 1

Why Do I Run?

15 years Later

Pain.....Hurt.....Anger.....Frustration.

All of these describe her. She takes what she wants, when she wants, and because she wants. 

"I've told you before stay out of my halls!" With that she slapped the books out of his hands. Her friends cackled as his books, papers, and materials glided across the hall floor. 

Neko looked at his books. His papers. His things. Had been cascaded across this floor. Those books which he freshly gathered. The sound of the books and image replayed in his mind over and over. He clenched his fist, his eyes shut. The memories. The fire roared, a kiss, the crash of the building. He heard the voices calling his name. Stop.

He thought. "Neko!" it echoed. Stop. Again it sounded, "SHUT UP!" His eyes flashed open, he then realized what he had done. His hand was tightly fixed on her throat. Her body pinned against the wall. Her feet trying, reaching, barely touching the ground. "Neko, let her go..." Leach spoke. Neko didn't know what or how he got here. But he didn't want to stop.

Layana held his wrist. Looking into his eyes. Nobody could move him. Neko stared into her eyes. As she fought to breath. This girl.

This.....this.....this vile creature.

He hated, he despised. The world could do with one less person. She was evil. The beatings, the torture, the agony she put him through everyday of this school year. He, even he had enough.

"It's not worth it." He heard his brother speak. Not worth it? How could this possibly be not worth it? The pain she caused me, the bruises, the humiliation. This, to Neko, was worth every bit of, "it". Then words echoed out his mouth that shook him to the bone. "Is this what your father would have wanted?" His grip almost immediately weakened. Layana pushed away falling to the ground. The hall was silent. Neko turned looking around. Phones out, cameras all around him.  He looked down at his hands. The anger, the pain, pure hatred. Where did it come from. Was it him. He stared at his hands. As if they where monsters, as if he...were a monster. Then his eyes met Leach. "Go, Neko. Get out of here."

He turned away running through the crowd pushing and shoving. Until he finally broke out into the fresh air.

He shoved his hands into his hood pocket. No longer able to look at them. He began to walk. Where he was walking? He knew not. To whom? That he knew not either. He just had to walk. Walk through the feelings. Walk through pain. Fight through the storm, and run through the memories. Then he ran. Faster. Every step carried him forward with more speed. He ran like his life was in danger. He wanted to go run away. But why he thought, why am I running? And just as soon as he thought this the answer seemed to appear to him.

The answer of why he was angry. What most of us humans can not get away from. What is causing us to run away from our problem?  What makes us cry? Why do the children hide under their covers at night? Why do we worry about others opinion about us? Why do we need others to tell us we are great? Why do we need others to tell us we are okay? Why do we need other to tell us everything will be okay? Why do we need something to cling too? Why do we run even though we have no where to run too? Why we ask? Why am I running? He thought? And all these questions led to one answer. And One Only.

Fear.