Under The Mistletoe

32| Uncountable

Chapter 32: Uncountable (Blake's POV)

We were both just sitting there. It was fairly sunny so the sun was warming us up from the cold as we sat on the grass. She was sitting between my legs with her back against my chest while my arms were around her. 

"Do you think she would have liked you? As my boyfriend?" Hope looked up at me. 

"I would hope so," I chuckled. "Do you think she would have?" 

She nodded slowly, "Yeah. I think she would love you, actually." 

"I'm glad." 

"Me too," she smiled, turning back to the grave. She sighed, staring at it. She took a few slow, deep breaths before leaning her head back against my shoulder. 

"She loves you, Hope," I whispered, kissing the side of her head. 

"I know," she said, her voice wavering. "I just miss her. And I hate myself every day for not coming here sooner," she sniffled. 

"Hope," I mumbled, holding her tighter. 

"I just miss her, Blake," she cried, her shoulders shaking as she sobbed. 

I rocked her slowly side to side. She has to let it out. She has to cry. She's never allowed herself to grieve for her mother before this. The only thing I can do is hold her and be there for her in every way possible right now. Because I love her. I do, I love her. 

"Can she please just come back?" she asked, wiping her cheeks while sniffling. "It's like," she paused, gathering herself. "It's like I've been stuck in the same fucking spot since she left. And I don't know how to move on," she scoffed. 

"You're doing just fine, baby," I whispered. 

"I don't even think she'd love me any-" 

"Don't, Hope. Don't say that. Her love for you is... uncountable. It can't be measured, it's infinitive, okay?" 

"Uncountable is a word?" she sniffled. 

"Yes," I chuckled while nodding. 

She turned around to look at me with confusion before turning back. She sniffled again, drying her tears. "I had a brain fart." 

"Okay," I laughed, kissing her cheek a few times. 

After sitting there for a few more minutes in silence, we decided to head out. "I have dinner next weekend with my dad's girlfriend, you know," she said as I parked the car in her driveway. 

"You said yes?" 

She nodded, "I couldn't say no to him. He seems so... happy." 

"I'm sure he is," I nodded. 

"Come on," she said before opening the door and stepping out. I climbed out, locking the car behind me and following her inside and up to her room. She shut the door as we entered and turned to me. I raised my eyebrows at her while taking a seat on the edge of her bed. 

"I need to tell you something," I said, grabbing her hands and pulling her over to me. 

She stumbled, falling into my lap and putting her arms around my neck. "What is it?" she asked with a smile. 

"I think I'm uh... I think I'm falling in love with you." 

"Are you?" she grinned. 

"No," I shook my head. She frowned in confusion and disappointment. "I think I am in love with you." She stared at me with a small smile on her lips. "I love you, Hope."