The Pain of Yesterday

Haunting hour

Bella's POV :

The halls of my old school building looked dark and eerie. My best friend Alex and I thought it'd be funny to cover the worst place we've spent our lives trashing the old run-down school.

I ran into the nearest bathroom pulling on the toilet paper, I dragged it all into the halls and laughed as Alex kicked over the trash bin. "I can't stand this place," I said looking at him with a frown.

"Yeah, I know what you mean it was like hell for us," he said quietly, I almost couldn't hear him.

We threw rocks that we got from outside earlier at the windows before sticking up our middle fingers at the crappy old building.

Alex looked down at the ground taking in a breath before he smiled at me softly "hey let's get out of here, yeah ?"

I nodded grabbing his hands and gently pulling him along. I didn't know where we were headed so I just started walking back to his house, Alex didn't mind as he fidgeted around trying to find the keys to unlock the door his parents were never home neither were mine that's how we liked it.

We both came from traumatic and toxic households that's why we were so close he didn't question my life and I didn't question his. We just get each other.

"I seriously don't want to go home tonight," I said as I threw myself on Alex's nice comfy bed it literally felt like sleeping on a cloud ugh I just  melt into it. "So don't then" Alex spoke while playing with my fingers looking back into my eyes.

"You know I can't" Trust me I wanted to stay here in this moment with him more than anything but my parents wouldn't spare me the next morning. I grabbed his face gently and pressed my forehead against his whispering to him "I'll come to see you first thing tomorrow".

He sighed while slowly letting go of my hand pouting "Stay out of trouble Bells". I chuckled walking out of his house shivering as the autumn breeze gave me a slight chill.

I dreaded the walk home, my parents always wanted a son someone they could rely on to be the man of the house when they get old who would have better opportunities to provide for them when things get rough. I felt like I could've been that person for them I guess they think more "traditional" according to them.

I walked into the somber-looking house, there was trash all over the place and it looked like there was a fight in the living room. It seemed like they weren't home so I clean up the broken pieces of glass and clean the dirty dishes, I'm assuming they had friends over.

"Alex I hate it here so much let's just run away together" I whispered into my phone in case my parents came back and fell asleep I didn't want them to hear me.

"Bells we can't, we don't have money or a plan love" he sounded so tired his voice laced with grogginess. I huffed into the phone "I know maybe one day".

"One day" he repeated full of hope.

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The next morning I woke up to arguing, I grabbed my cardigan and tried to put it on while running down the stairs to find the miscreant who woke me out of my slumber. I sighed as my mom pushed my dad and continued to call him names "You guys need to chill it's every day I'm sick of it" I screamed making them both look at me with disgust.

"Your Sick of it, Your Sick of it " my father shouted shoving my mom out the way as she came close to me, she may not like me much but sometimes she tries to protect me from him when he gets like this.

"Bella, this is all your fault we lost everything because your what Depressed as you call it" he used finger quotes to mock me and invalidate my feelings, I scoffed I can't believe he still thinks this is all an act why would I purposely allow myself to suffer.

I know what he was referring to when he said they lost everything because of me though, high school was such a dark place but it seemed each time he was pissed he brought me back to those harsh memories I tried so hard to fight against.

"Dad those people tortured me time and again you still think I could handle it I was at my limit when I was lying in that hospital bed you still don't believe me, what's it going to take you to believe your OWN daughter? " I screamed at him while squeezing my hand in a tight fist.

My Dad grabbed my hands pulling up the sleeves on my cardigan putting my wrists on full display littered in fresh cuts and laughed "You still haven't stopped I see, no man would have done this to himself god why are you such a screw-up?"

"This is also your fault too, why couldn't you give me a son?" he spat at my mother who sat there taking his insults quietly.

"I'm sorry please she will get better I promise, Simon" she grabbed his hands gently trying to distract him from me slowly nodding her head as if to tell me to leave.

I ran upstairs taking a shower and getting dressed then grabbing my phone before running to Alex's house.

I just want to cry so bad my throat burning as tears stung my eyes, I wish I was normal but I had to be such a loser and a disappointment. Alex sat on his porch with his skateboard looking down and I ran to him before he could look up I hugged him.

"Oh Bella what did he do this time?" he said while pushing my hair back and holding me closer. He didn't ask anymore instead he rubbed my back and whispered sweet words to me.

Hi, everyone, my name is Asha and this is story is much of my own experiences mixed with a character that I feel I just relate to way too much. I hope you enjoyed the first chapter and comment on how you feel so far.

Also, if you would like to send me messages I'm not responsive on here so try my Instagram: bella01.x

Thank you for reading remember if you enjoy vote, comment and sharing would be appreciated.