Invisible Armies

Chapter 32

He looks to Mulligan. "Are we ready?"

"Record away."

Keiran raises the microphone to his lips and affects a French accent.

"This is Anna Fiche-Toi, personal assistant to Jack Shadbold." He pauses a moment. "I apologize for not going through the usual channels, but this is a matter of some urgency. Danielle Leaf and Keiran Kell have been seen at a movie theatre and will be on the Third Street Promenade in Santa Monica in thirty minutes. You are instructed to be there to intercept."

He nods at Mulligan, who types a few lines. "Anna Fiche-Toi?" Danielle asks.

"Anna Fuck You, loosely translated."

"You don't sound like an Anna."

"He does now," Mulligan says. "Listen."

And his computer plays back Keiran's speech, the pitch adjusted up at least two octaves, the voice obviously filtered. It sounds more inhuman than female.

"You're sure you want to come?" Keiran asks Danielle and Jayalitha. "We don't need you. And if there's trouble..."

"If there is trouble I am sure it will find us regardless," Jayalitha says.

"Fair point. Let's take our toys and go pay the bad guys a little ambush."

Getting into his car again costs Mulligan a half-pint of sweat. Danielle can see why he rarely leaves home. In his apartment, before his computer, Mulligan is a master of the universe. Why go to a gruelling physical effort just to become an object of pity?

"Try not to get pulled over," Keiran says as Mulligan swings the car clumsily out into nighttime Valley traffic, wobbling between lanes. "Might be hard to explain how you happened to pick up two wanted terrorists and one illegal immigrant."

"Sorry. It's been a while," Mulligan says.

Jayalitha gasps and Danielle grabs at the seat in front of her as the car skids into a last-second-decision left turn.

"You don't say," Keiran says drily. "Also try not to get us killed. Killed is bad."

"You wanna drive?"

"I would if I could, but I seem to have too many legs."

Danielle's jaw drops at the insensitivity of that comment, but Mulligan chuckles and says, "Those damn legs gonna get you in trouble someday."

"They already have," Keiran agrees.

"You oughta get them removed. I know a doctor."

"I was saying just the other day I wanted to lose a few stone."

"That's brilliant. The Amputation Diet! We'll sell millions. Make Atkins look like a chump."

"You're both sick," Danielle says, amused despite herself.

"It's not us," Mulligan says, "it's the fuckin' rest of the world."

** *

The Third Street Promenade is an upscale open-air shopping mall, a pedestrian thoroughfare in Santa Monica only a few blocks from the sea, decorated with elaborate fountains and dinosaur topiaries, entertained by buskers, lined by stores vending all the famous brand names of American commerce. It is a very popular place to shop, wander, and meet. This is only partly because of its laid-back luxury. In Southern California, where the unwritten law is "drive or be dogmeat", easy parking is a draw in itself, and Second and Fourth Street, which bracket the Promenade, boast a half-dozen inexpensive parking garages.