❝HELP HELP HELLLP!❞ ❝Hello, this is the Fine Apple market, and no, we are not an Apple knockoff store; how may I help you?❞ ❝Well, someone just stole my phone.❞ ❝Sorry, what?❞ ❝You asked how you could help me.❞ ❝...Oh.❞ ◽︎◾︎◽︎ in which a jittery workaholic who realizes she needs help and an antisocial beach bum who do...
[COMPLETED] "I could bring some lunch and drop it off at your house if you give me your address......" "Oh hell no!!! I don't want some 60 year old creep going around my neighborhood dropping food and running after little girls. " "Excuse me. But this '60 something year old creep' is a college student who is 21 and VE...
"Hi, welcome to Bittersweet Treats, where even your sweetest dreams come true. My name is Aidan. How can I help you today?" "You sound annoyingly cheerful today." "It's all 'part of the job." "Cool beans." "So, how can I help you?" "I have a complaint about my ice cream." "I'm sorry. What happened to your order?" "It...
in which a famous football quarterback decided to break up with his girlfriend over the phone. the girl who answered wasn't his girlfriend. • "Hi, this is-" "I want a fucking girlfriend." "..." "..." "Well, as far as I can remember, I'm not an escort." • #30 in Featured as of July 8th 2018 #5 in Light Romance as of Ju...
ᴀʟᴀɴᴀ ᴀᴅᴀᴍꜱ ɪꜱ ᴀɴ ᴀꜱᴘɪʀɪɴɢ ᴘᴀɪɴᴛᴇʀ, ᴡᴀɴᴛɪɴɢ ᴛᴏ ɢᴇᴛ ɪɴᴛᴏ ʏᴀʟᴇ ᴜɴɪᴠᴇʀꜱɪᴛʏ'ꜱ ᴀʀᴛ ᴘʀᴏɢʀᴀᴍ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴡʜᴇɴ ꜱʜᴇ ᴀᴄᴄɪᴅᴇɴᴛᴀʟʟʏ ʀɪɴɢꜱ ᴜᴘ ᴀ ꜰʟᴏʀɪꜱᴛ ꜱʜᴏᴘ ɪɴꜱᴛᴇᴀᴅ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴀᴅᴍɪꜱꜱɪᴏɴꜱ ᴏꜰꜰɪᴄᴇ, ᴛʜɪɴɢꜱ ɢᴇᴛ ᴀ ʟɪᴛᴛʟᴇ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴇꜱᴛɪɴɢ. ᴄᴏᴘʏʀɪɢʜᴛ © 2018 ʙʏ ᴘᴜʟ ᴘᴀʀᴍᴀʀ ᴀʟʟ ʀɪɢʜᴛꜱ ʀᴇꜱᴇʀᴠᴇᴅ
in which lennon accidentally swipes right for noah on tinder and lands herself in the middle of a very sticky situation
"why are you back again?" "donut worry about that." "..." "..." "did you just-" "yup." #9 in short story [081217]
"Is your refrigerator running?" "No, my refrigerator is not running." "Well you better...wait, what?" "Actually, it broke down a week ago because it knew that you were going to call with that stupid line and it decided it would rather die than listen to you say it. So now, thanks to you, I don't have a fridge and all...
"Hello, we are here to advise you on all your questions, concerns, and problems related to relationships. How may I assist you today?" "I think my girlfriend is cheating on me." Everything started with this simple line.
❝I- what? What are you talking about? Who is this?❞ ❝Well the bathroom stall says that this number is the gateway to a good time, and unless you're trying to say that a bathroom stall is lying to me, I think I need a little more information to be sold. Do you have like a yelp page I could look up? Past customer review...
a story about them; through a series of texts. "you don't need to meet someone in real life to meet the real them" 「 copyright @simrankdhaliwal highest rank - first in short story lowercase intended for stylistic purposes 」
It was a prank gone wrong... ...But it brought them closer. "No James, I'm really sorry. Please, Please don't leave me. I know I should've listened to what you had to say. Instead I'm in the middle of nowhere balling my eyes out. Please don't leave me, I love you." *sniffle* "..." "J-James?" "..." "You l-love me too...