"Hello?" "Um, hey?" "Wait, you don't sound like my Aunt Kathy." "Unless I was miraculously converted into a member of the opposite gender and somehow related to whoever is on the other side of this call, then yeah. I'm not your Aunt Kathy." "Oh, shiitake mushrooms." ...
When Helena finds a phone on the night train, she decides to text the first number in the list of contacts in order to figure out who it belongs to. ***** Helena Santos hasn't had the easiest life. At tw...
❝Slice of Heaven Pizzeria, carry out or delivery?❞ ❝D-de-delivery.❞ ❝What would you like this evening?❞ ❝A large p-pepperoni penis.❞ ❝...❞ ❝...❞ ❝I don't know about the pepperoni part but I can sure get you everything else.❞ ----- In which a socially awkward girl attempts to order pizza only to meet a fli...
❝I- what? What are you talking about? Who is this?❞ ❝Well the bathroom stall says that this number is the gateway to a good time, and unless you're trying to say that a bathroom stall is lying to me, I think I need a little more information to be sold. Do you have like a yelp page I could look up? Past customer review...
Natalie received a message saving her from her demise. The sender is none other than Death himself.