HEYOOOOOO!!! My name is Tobi, definitely not Obito! I am with Akatsuki and I kick butt! When I'm home alone I like to run around base naked with a stick. Don't tell anyone!

I go on comedy central sometimes because my jokes are the best in the town! World! Village! Whatever! Deidara's art is a ripoff but don't tell him I said that!

Don't judge but sometimes I steal some of Deidara's clay and eat it.

When he's not there I like to sneak into Itachi's room and put on his sharingan contact lenses.

I steal some of Kakuzu's money and use it to buy rubber ducks and silly bands. Don't tell Kakuzu!

I like to take Hidan's backscratcher thingy and use it to fry my chicken and poke my butt.

I tied Sasori to a tree and ran away like a man. When Sasori found me he tied me to a tree and left me there to die. Now you know not to tie Sasori to a tree.

When I see Zetsu flirting with a plant I write an emotional poem about how plants fall in love and White Zetsu starts crying while Black Zetsu is scarred for life.

When I see Pein and Konan sitting together I like to run up and yell "THE SHIP HAS SAILED!" And then I run away before Pein kills me.

This is the story of Tobi's life, not Obito's. Pm me if you wanna tie Sasori to a tree. Or whatever really!

Again, Don't judge!