I've been a covert operative in a foreign country, jumped out of helicopters for fun, and bungee jumped over the side of a Styrofoam factory into a vat of beans made for beanbags. I can also leap Lego towers in a single bound, pack school lunches like a boss, and burn myself on any hot surface. My multiskilling is out of this world and I successfully masquerade as an average parent 24/7. Do not be fooled by my mediocrity. To do so is at your own peril. Also, don't believe everything you read!