I know things are probably not aligning the way you want them, maybe you're overwhelmed or maybe you've just lost your spice to write, I don't truly know and I can't claim to know but what I do know is that you love writing, its a fun part of you and it helps you let out all the frustration you have, I'm one of the many readers of your works and I will always love it, I reread them every chance I get, because your words are beautiful and so are you, I will wait for a lifetime till you update again hopefully you would have gotten your spice back.
However this reaches you, I hope you're alright, and can't wait for you to be back at it and writing what you love.