Dear Kiddos (if you still have “teen” at the end of your age, I’m talking to you),
Many of you are the same age as my students. To the best of my ability, I supported several of them through name and pronoun changes; as they struggled to understand their identities; what it means to have healthy relationships; what and how to reveal to their parents, guardians, and peer group.
First, let me say that, if you are LGBTQ+, and you have parents or guardians who support you, please go thank them (as soon as you finish this post) and seal the deal with a big hug. If you are fearful of how they will respond, whether for religious reasons or because they are behind the times, first consider this Recovery International spot: Excuse don’t accuse. The adults who love you are likely still catching up.
Know that you are not alone, and that there are organizations and counseling available to help you deal with your feelings, and to learn how to navigate approaching your parents or guardians. Please realize that feelings are not facts; and that hormones are powerful biochemicals that can wreak havoc on our bodies starting in puberty and lasting into late adulthood.
I want to reiterate that last point: Hormones are among the most powerful chemicals in the human body. And scientists now know that the human brain does not reach full maturity until about the age of 25; this impacts how young people make decisions. So, please respect these beastly biochemicals and wait, wait, wait until you are no longer a minor--ideally until your brain is done growing--before you change your body in irreversible ways. Delayed gratification reaps positive rewards.
If you or someone you love is LGBTQ+, or still questioning whether they are, the JED Foundation, The Trevor Project, and Advocates for Youth can help. Adolescence is rarely easy, but when teens and the adults who love them are #bravetogether, this stage of life can be one of the best. I genuinely hope you enjoy it.