My name is Discoplax, and I am not who you think I am. I was born during the late Devonian and have lived my life in small intervals between decades-long slumbers. I am a crab, but also a fungus. I boiled unto the world from a volcano fed by the lakes of Hell itself, and Satan both hates and adores me, the mushroom that grew from his very ear. I like to make animal friends of all kinds, not excluding arthropods and bacteria. My music taste hasn't changed much since the August of 1939 and I don't suspect it ever will. 

I write when I want, combining all things from my life into a crab pot of despair and chaos. Enjoy, mortals.