Petlover of randomness.

Forget it I won’t keep you updated

Guys I’m too nervous for this concert what if they don’t let me in because the retarded people who give us a 6 week notice on companion card expiring and then what if the guards or those and the entry door to the concert don’t let me in because of that. Fucking world again HUH WILL YOU BE HAPPY IF I NEVER GO TO A CONCERT TILL I TURN INTO A FREAKING HOOLIGAN?????  Well after this knowing it’ll fail and the never get to go to concerts curse is DOING this sending to them like “hey guys who make the cards let’s continue the unlucky streak let’s never let Em go to a concert let her lose hope and give up on concerts over all. 
          
          
          
          While yes I do have super sensitive ears but still I must see what it’s like to experience it I’ll even where ear defense. 
          
          
          
          
          
          So I’ll update y’all if it went well. 
          
          
          
          Oh wait who the fuck am I kidding spoiler alert we all know they won’t let me experience it. 

The dumb shit world has done it yet again I’m too fucking cursed to go to one stinkin concert in my ugly rotten life might as well just sleep the whole day till it’s over no wonder concerts stands for 
          Can’t go
          Or 
          Need to 
          Confirm 
          Everyone is a 
          Real hooligan otherwise 
          Time to inflict the curse on you so you can’t ever go and even if you try we and the dumb universe will find a way to prevent you.

So I might’ve burned my hand yesterday

Beginning to get the sense that all people irl and (especially lately) on messenger are traitors and only exist to betray. How to protect yourself from all this? Prevent this from ever happening?

It’s as if he doesn’t even care about me or how I feel about all this and being deceived into a somebody who just texts you only for to know your alive pets heck even if I you know just casual talk like what his interests are and hobbies he just ignores and it’s pet Alfie and Luna with him and will ignore other ‘talk’ I can’t do this anymore it hurts that he doesn’t even care for the deceased or me so DO IT please teach me to close myself off from meeting or accepting anyone new ever again protect my heart from all these lies and false friendships

******WARNING URGENT EMOTIONALLY URGENT*****
          
          
          Honestly idk if I should just close myself from anyone new no more. 
          So basically someone sends me a friend request and so thinking his file looked ok enough I accept and now I love talking about my pets but too I’d like to yk talk about anything really but this is where it feels he’s not worth it. So basically he wants to be part of my family and he lives in different country but all he is interested in is my budgie and dog more so my dog, doesn’t even bother to ask questions that are appropriate and acceptable and just only cares to know about those 2 not even me or cares to know about my Pecky. Sure she passed away but I like talking about her too but idk all he cares about is those 2 and even when I tell him about her he doesn’t even have the heart to say sorry for your loss. I think I might just block and delete him soon it just feels the same day after day. Just doesn’t feel true or genuine. Honestly at this rate I think for the sake of all things ‘humanly right’ I should just never accept friend request ever again no matter how their facebook file looks. I feel deceived like he doesn’t care about me or her just wants to get to me just for those 2 yes I do love my pets dearly but this doesn’t feel right. What are your thoughts? How do I never let anyone else in ever again? How do I just close myself off from everyone new and NEVER let them in ever again? Please teach me to be a rejecter not a taker who just ends up realising they’re just hurtrrs and nobody will ever be ‘right’

I neeeeeeeeeeeeds a cockatiel

Tbh right now atm the last few weeks irl feels much like here (aside from the whole your an outsider to us if you don’t drink alcohol slop) but no seriously can’t see some of my friends for awhile they both went overseas and my other ones well I hardly ever see them. Yet since this new boyfriend of my mum’s she just seems to heavily neglect me idk and now thanks to accidental bug spray on my 2DS I’ve tried what I could not working and I’ve asked mum and she just does nothing and acts like it’s nothing. I swear at this fucking rate nobody irl or here will even noticed if I just die right now in this very spot. I know I get overwhelmed if too much interaction but tbh just feels empty without it happening plus losing my cockatiel doesn’t help. Heck I wish I never lost Pop cause he was one of the few who actually would equally socialise with me and everyone else too. Yet everyone will miss the family fame sister of mine when she moves far away (cause she drinks so she’s not treated as an outsider and they always gawk over her muscles and have all the interest in the world to hear her life stories but never ask to hear of mine even if for equal amount of days/weeks/months they haven’t seen me) honestly I’m just going more and more empty just cant really feel anything even when talked to or rarely ever interacted with yet when by myself for too long and not interacted with (aside from when I want time alone) I just hurt more and more idk if I can fucking do it anymore it’s like I no longer matter to anyone anymore I miss those days where being equal and fair was treated as if it was a law in my family but now the so called ‘new law’ is yeah as I said about stupid drinking if you drink ur popular but no one can top my sister at that. Heck I’ve even been used by someone just to get to her, I’ve been betrayed that many times losing count. Sorry I’ll stop ranting I’m probably a waste of space and existence anyway. )

Not that anyone will read this but my goals for this year are running more (that’s if my ankle will ever let me without hurting so bad making me collapse to the ground) get Alfie a new bird pal, find a permanent cure for my ankle and hide my emotions more than ever before and hopefully to the point I never show any of them to anyone ever again. What about you guys what are your goals for next year?