JustYourAverageToast
@deuxdude You’re very welcome my guy.
JustYourAverageToast
deuxdude
@JustYourAverageToast Great. Thanks for asking
JustYourAverageToast
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So, Kratos Vs Asura… Yea. God of Boy Vs Man Too Angry To Die. Fuck my LIFE have we got some stuff to talk about…
First off a couple disclaimers before I get into it. One; no matter which ending was chosen, we can all agree that Mithra deserved better. Two; I mean no disrespect nor do I encourage ANY harassment towards DevilArtemis when making this fight. The guy is a legend, ok? His comedic and animation talent are top tier.
So, this one felt… weaker compared to some of the others they’ve done. The animation was nice, yet felt dragged out just so that Kratos could bully Asura into blowing through each form without any chance to recover. There was little to no weight behind any of their punches, like isn’t that the whole point of a fight between two dudes of this caliber? So you get to feel the rippling impact every time they throw hands?
As for the result, well it goes without saying the majority of us saw it coming a LITERALLY mile away. One of Death Battle’s main problems is inherent bias when it comes to deciding on the victor. Why waste all that time researching when one of the contenders is STRONGER than the other from the fucking get-go?
Something I hate? Its how they blatantly ignore their own rules about sticking with canon feats/statements ONLY and then proceed to do the exact fucking opposite and hit us with these insane composite versions that introduce a level of unfairness that fucks up the whole experience. How do you expect to have two characters at their peak when it’s random asspulls every five minutes?
All that being said, dicks out for Ghost Rider on the next one. Spawn’s cosmology hasn’t gotten any notable updates in like the past 10 years while even NOW Marvel continues to fatten their own characters.
JustYourAverageToast
@deuxdude Ig? Not much to be said for a casual review. Anywho enough of that nonsense, how’re you and your mother doing?
Donte445
totally not late but Happy New Year bro
JustYourAverageToast
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It’s for us to play ‘Is it Peak or do we Pass?’
Black Myth Wukong and Stellar Blade got me bricked up (especially the latter because it’ll be harder to play with one hand), so I need the input of ya’ll to grease this little investigation of mine. Look, it’s 2025 and my Series X’s hard drive is fuller than a fucking Astro World concert. It’s time for a clean slate, preferably one that’s not chopped af.
- Black Myth Wukong: Do I buy or do I go tell Sun to clone himself, enlarge his staff to universal-proportions then peg said clone with it then pass on it?
- Stellar Blade: Do I buy and give Eve the infinite backshots then glaze her face with that good nut like Krispy Kreme? Or do I swipe right and pass on it?
JustYourAverageToast
@BIG_GOOSEY2 Monkey fuckers always be standing on business. How else do you think we’ve received all those ape-related cultural icons?
BIG_GOOSEY2
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offensive
@JustYourAverageToast Not even gonna lie. I am biased heavily towards black myth. It's like if dark souls fucked a monkey and produced this beautiful game.
JustYourAverageToast
The three essential DON’TS to be known in life:
1) Never ask a woman her age.
2) Never inquire about a person’s salary.
3) Most important of all, don’t under any circumstances tell a ‘power levels are bullshit’ person what the Kaio-Ken does.
The_Dreamwalker
@JustYourAverageToast Taken from the Whitest Kids You Know Never take cough syrup and mix it up with iodine and lye Never take cough syrup and mix it up with iodine and lye Never take the strike pads off a matchbook Or go to a hardware store and then look Near the paint thinners for muriatric acid Or go bring a pot into a rapid boil Or get hydrogen peroxide Never go to a farming store and then buy pH strips and PVC pipes Those fuel cans that make outdoor grills light 'Cause that's how you make crystal meth!
JustYourAverageToast
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When that one sick employee STILL decides to come into work:
Boss: “Toast, why are you shouting?!”
“If you MUST know, I’m shouting because this fucked up infected motherfucker just shot a bunch of toxic SNOT at me!!!”
Boss: “… Not a bad reason.”
JustYourAverageToast
@Chraffle Got the idea from a Sonic animation that made use of said audio ironically. Cheers, fam.
JustYourAverageToast
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*Taps mic and clears throat* This thing on? Fucktastic let’s get active. Merry Christmas 2024 everybody and to those of unspecified genders!
In hindsight, I think we can all agree that this year had areas with the need for MASSIVE improvement. Let’s see, Baltimore’s Key Bridge collapsed, innumerable shootings, the Tangerine Terrorist SOMEHOW got re-elected- *tosses list against wall* look point is, things turned to be a shitshow.
But we all gotta keep moving forward, right? That’s what New’s Years is all about, fresh perspectives and more efficacious goals being set (Ya’ll fucking well better or I’ll suplex ya). So I’ll leave things here for now, since I’ll be taking a few days to let the Christmas craze calm itself down like a bad adderall trip. ‘Till next time!
JustYourAverageToast
Aight this one’s for my Zenless Zone Zero fans:
Grace or Nicole?
This one’s finna be close, lads.
JustYourAverageToast
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Perhaps his transformation wasn’t the ONLY reason they knew him as ‘Legendary’:
Broly: “Do you SEE this hole behind me? That’s going to be the size of each of your assholes, when I’m DONE with you!”
Goku: *Looks over his shoulder at Future Trunks and Teen Gohan* “I dunno about these two, but MY anus is off limits!”
Trunks: “What the fuck, Goku?! My anus is off limits TOO!!!”
Goku: “TAKE ONE FOR THE TEAM, TRUNKS!!!”
Trunks: “Are you SERIOUS?!?!”
Goku: “SPREAD YOUR CHEEKS NOW!!!”
Trunks: *Screams for mercy but gets cut off abruptly*
Gohan: “Oh nah, them n*ggas tripping!”
