KengNampingFFs

Wattpad, what is this behavior? I spent hours writing a whole ass chapter.. pouring my time and energy. I closed the app thinking everything was saved.. only to reopen it and find the entire chapter gone. Just... gone.And I can't even restore it from the revision history because there's nothing there. Do you know how exhausting it is to lose hours of work like that? Writing isn't something you can just recreate word for word. The emotions, the flow, the ideas you had in that moment.. once they are gone, they are gone.
          I'm genuinely so frustrated right now. All that time and effort wasted for absolutely nothing :( 

So disheartening :( 
          I regret wasting my time and energy... 

This might sound funny coming from me but writing this story is actually much harder than it looks.
          You might not know but I absolutely love angst. I am an angst sucker through and through. Give me heartbreak, emotional damage, suffering and complicated feelings and I will happily write hundreds of chapters about it.
          That's exactly why this story is such a challenge for me. It's soft, fluffy, sweet and full of love. And while I adore these characters, my brain constantly wants to throw them into emotional disasters 
          Yall might not know but I have another book from 2020 with over 600K reads (Not Knp.. and Please don't ask which book.. I absolutely hate that account for some reasons) It's one of the angstiest things I have ever written and to this day I still receive messages about it. Some readers tell me I ruined their mental health. Some curse me for putting them through that pain. Honestly I have heard everything imaginable because of that story.
          I don't even login that account anymore because the moment I do.. I'm greeted by angry comments reminding me of the emotional damage I apparently caused.
          And yet.. despite all of that.. I still love angst.
          I already have a plot for another angst story (KNP.. because I'm dying to write one) sitting in my notes.. waiting for its turn. So yes..I will eventually write it. I know myself too well not to. Right now, though, life is keeping me busy, and this fluffy little story is what I'm focusing on.
          By the way thank you for reading and for staying with me. ✨
          

Why are you so cruel to me? Just show up already. I'm tired of pretending I'm okay without you. I want to hold you so tight and cry until my chest stops hurting. I want to tell you about every sleepless night.. every silent breakdown.. every moment I needed you and had nobody. You have no idea how much pain I have been carrying alone. 

Honestly, I don’t even know who I’m writing this for. I have zero followers but I’m still getting reads, votes and love...and that alone makes me really happy.
          I don’t care if it takes days, months or even years to reach even 1 follower. As long as someone is reading, voting and enjoying the story, that’s more than enough for me.
          Thank you to everyone who’s here. I truly appreciate you all ✨️