Luci_ous

https://youtu.be/Nb_NdYj_E84?si=Ih36WDCH1krWcoop

I think I’ve wasted life again,
          And pulled them down into my end,
          A spinning throat of ego’s tide,
          Where hollow shells are left inside.
          
          I watch the others build their days,
          While mine dissolves in quiet haze,
          My hopes decay without a sound,
          In rooms where only I am found.
          
          One dying wish I hold too tight,
          To fade away beyond their sight,
          This weight I drag, this silent rot,
          Consumes me more than what I’ve got.
          
          If I could kill this careless flame,
          I’d live alone and take the blame,
          And if you read these words I’ve penned,
          I’ve lost the self I couldn’t mend.
          

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          MSFLEYA 

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Everyone gathered outside the villa. That's when I saw Don Rafael again, standing near, worry written all over his face.
          
          He looked at me and asked softly, "Have you been in school, Tasya?"
          
          I stammered. "No, Don Rafael."
          
          "Tomorrow, wear your best dress. We will visit your family."
          
          It was the happiest night of my life. My chest felt like it would burst. I wanted to hug him, to thank him, but before I could, he was gone. 
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/1573829218-the-monsters-in-my-diary-part-6-the-fear-of-their

One night, they were drinking under the umbrella hut on the cliff. They called out to me.
          
          "Hey, you! Get us more beer!"
          
          "I'm not allowed inside the villa," I replied nervously.
          
          "Are you stupid? Then ask someone else!" one of them snapped.
          
          I slowly walked toward the villa, but I didn't see anyone. So I just went straight to the kitchen.
          
          I opened the freezer to grab some beers when suddenly someone grabbed me from behind.
          
          One of his brothers. I think he was the youngest.
          
          He pushed me against the freezer and trapped me there.
          
          "Sssshhh, quiet," he whispered, his voice full of malice.
          
          His hands were all over me. He pressed his body against mine. That same helplessness from before washed over me, but this time, I didn't fight. I let him do whatever he wanted.
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/1573584069-the-monsters-in-my-diary-part-5-i%27m-feeding-the

"Hija, how old are you?" he asked.
          
          That question was a nightmare for me. I knew the moment I answered, the monsters would grab me.
          
          a book, with a teddy bear imprinted on its cover. My eyes locked on it. I had never seen anything like it in my entire life.
          
          "If you don't want to talk," he said softly, "just write... draw... put anything in that book."
          
          He placed a pencil in my hand. "It belonged to my little girl. She died last summer."
          
          That gave me some comfort, knowing that not everyone in that place was a monster.
          
          https://www.wattpad.com/1573558537-the-monsters-in-my-diary-part-4-the-teddy-bear