MAF9898

Still working hard on chapter 24. Editing these chapters takes so much time and detailed energy; sometimes it's hard to find time to write, but I've got some schedule changes coming up, and I'm really hoping to be able to lock in on writing chapter 25 and be able to upload both by the end of August. No promises, but I promise this book means as much to me as it does to all of yo,u and I won't give up no matter what!

MAF9898

Still working hard on chapter 24. Editing these chapters takes so much time and detailed energy; sometimes it's hard to find time to write, but I've got some schedule changes coming up, and I'm really hoping to be able to lock in on writing chapter 25 and be able to upload both by the end of August. No promises, but I promise this book means as much to me as it does to all of yo,u and I won't give up no matter what!

MAF9898

My anxiety is on a completely different level. It feels like all the self-work I have put in over the past several months just vanished. Suddenly, I'm analyzing everything, picking at my skin again, and feeling hopeless at every turn. My creativity is at an all-time low, and I am just fighting to keep my head above water. The book is not done, and I won't give up on it, but I'm not gonna lie to you and act like life is easy right now because it's anything but. I wanna cry at every turn, people are testing my loyalty and forcing my hand at times. I won't be a victim, and I won't succumb to the painful thoughts in my mind. The storm will pass, and the book will move forward, as will life. It's coming, just be patient, please.

MAF9898

قد تكون الرسالة مسيئة 
Hi readers, I'm working hard, and this chapter is taking a lot of grit to get through. I promise it's always worth it. However, you will get a double feature of 24 & 25 after I finish them. Sorry to keep you waiting, so below is a special treat! Ch24 Sneak Peek: 
          Pulling up to my house, I could feel my heart pounding as I passed Maya's house, as if I could feel her watching my every move, even though I knew she was sleeping. This hour was too early for her.
          I watched Kyle and Miles marching toward me, shaking my head. I slammed the door to my truck just as Miles yelled, "Why the hell haven't you answered any of our calls or texts?"
          I waved him off and started for the house.
          Kyle grabbed my shoulder hard. "Stop acting like a fucking child! You disappear all night, go radio silent, and you think we're just supposed to sit there like idiots?"
          I turned sharply and shoved him off me. "Get the fuck off me!"
          Kyle stepped right back in my face, not backing down. "We've known you since we were kids, Gray. I can see it — you're spiraling again. You look like shit, you smell like chemicals, and you expect us to believe it's just weed? What the fuck did you take this time? Percs? Something worse? Don't you dare lie to our faces."
          Miles stepped closer, voice low but sharp with frustration. "We're still your fucking brothers, whether you like it or not. You can't keep vanishing and self-destructing every time shit gets hard. We're not the enemy here, man. But you sure as hell treat us like we are."
          "Yeah?" I snarled. "Well, maybe I should just handle my own shit from now on."
          Kyle threw his hands up. "Handle your own shit? Look at you! You're falling apart and too stubborn to admit it. We've had your back through everything, and you keep pushing us away. When are you gonna grow the fuck up?"

MAF9898

Yall I am so proud of my novel- another peek into the new chapter coming soon! I’m so excited but I’m a strange way this is a sickening book and it’s been rough to write. So thank you all for the support and I couldn’t keep going without knowing ppl are out there actually reading and keeping up with it! We also just hit 1.3k what a milestone!!!!! Thanks again!

MAF9898

قد تكون الرسالة مسيئة 
Ch 24 is halfway finished! YAY! Sneak peek: I was so distracted that I ran straight into someone and landed hard on my ass in the middle of the hallway. I groaned, tears already burning in my eyes as I looked up.
          Jacob stood there, eyes wide with surprise. "Shit, Maya—are you okay? Can I help you up?" I shook my head slowly, unable to hold back the tears anymore. They spilled over hot and fast. He hesitated, clearly remembering everything that had happened between us, but when he saw the tears, his expression softened with guilt and worry. He lowered himself to my level, careful not to touch me.
          "I know I'm probably the last person you want help or advice from right now," he said quietly, voice heavy with regret, "but... you're stronger than this. And I'm sorry. For all of it." My heart ached at the sound of my best friend again. I missed him so much it hurt; my lips curved into a small, comforting smile. He offered his hand again, smiling gently this time. "Come on. I have no idea why you're up this early, but at least you're not being forced to go on one of those brutal runs with me by Danny, am I right?"
          A tiny, broken laugh escaped me despite everything. I took his hand and let him help me to my feet. My legs felt shaky, my chest tight like someone was squeezing my ribs. "Thank you, Jacob," I whispered, voice cracking.
          He didn't let go of my hand right away. His thumb brushed lightly over my knuckles. I wanted a hug so badly my arms ached with it, but the memory of that night made fear spike through the longing. Jacob swallowed, eyes flicking away for a second like he was arguing with himself. "Maya..." he started, voice low and careful. "I know I'm the last person who deserves to ask you this right now, but... do you—" He cut himself off, jaw tightening. Then he forced the words out anyway. "Do you... need a hug? It's okay if the answer's no. I won't be mad or upset. I just... I can see you're hurting. And I hate that I'm part of the reason why."