I don't know what you are going through and maybe I never will. But don't do it with yourself, ending your life. Trust me, with wrong people around life's a bit longer and with the right ones it's way too shorter, even if you live for a 1000 years. Take your time, breathe and work hard. Try getting out of your current environment. Trust me, there's better food, people and places out there. Don't die before you know what things you capable of, w/o knowing the bestest version of you, the world and so much more.