Well, hello there. Who am I? No you probably didn't ask that. Or maybe you did. After all why else would you be on my profile? Maybe a story of mine caught your eye. Or maybe you're here to shun me for some reason I'm not aware of. Or perhaps...wait a second, this is supposed to be an introduction isn't it? 

Why, where are my manners? Oh, look, there they are. Now to just-hey...goddam-stop running. Get back over here. No...NO- you stay out of the fridge. Don't you take my ice cream- goddammit, get over here. And where are YOU going Mr. Cents? You know what...FINE. I DON'T NEED ANY OF YOU. GOOD RIDDANCE!

Hm? Oh, you're still here. Well, make yourself comfortable. Read a story while you're here. I'll be elsewhere in the house, so if I don't respond, just give it while. Finding lost things take time.