Hmm...I understand
"Hmm...I understand"
So many times have I said this to you , so many times now that I've lost count and these words their earnesty, exhausting me of trust and peace, leaving behind but a ginormous void within my being.
A void that bloomed out of the lies you've fed my suspicions ,
A void that threatened the reality I've lived in perhaps the only one where "I" and "You" could co-exist as "We",
A void that raised the questions I'm so afraid to ask...
Dubious thoughts invaded my mind as Iwondered if you've always been this way or was I so blinded by your charm that I refused to believe anything but what I wished were true.
My sanity is spiralling into the unknown , no longer can I tell truth from tale , all of this is making me claustrophobic , entrapped in a maze I can't find my way out of ,it's true that this is sick, pardoning your lies and excuses over and over and over again and yet I know when tomorrow arrives you'll lie to me again for the umpteenth time and I'll believe you again for the umpteenth time inspire my better judgement and this cycle, it will decend upon yet another dawn...A lie for today, a lie for tomorrow and yet another for the days that follow...
And every single time I will but flash a weak smile and say,"Hmm...I understand" .
How long? they askHow long will I buy the lies of a liar? A little longer perhaps just until i've found the courage to liberate the illusions that burden the burial grounds of my Heart...
~psychotic
