"Who am I not?"

We could start with rapper. I'm probably not a rapper. I'll get there though. When I'm finished working on my PUNchlines.

Or a bartender. I couldn't make PUNch to save a life. 

Ha. The jokes we wished we never saw. *wipes tear from left eye; the other has an eye patch*

"Ho! Ho! Ho! Shiver me timbers! "

Oh. And um....add pirate to the list.