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Like that's where I want to be- free..not in London, maybe I'd live in Malta or smth idk

I JUST remembered the feeling, the freedom..that I knew I could be free from supervision (cuz I went with just my.sister)

At troxy btw, but this is a diff venue for p1harmony now..but darn..it's weird. I started sobbing last night cuz I remembered the day- even tho I had 4 hours of sleep for that day and too excited to sleep otw to the place and uhm..yeah

Why would I go tho I see Pretty ppl all the time

Why am I holding myself back? Oh, simple. It's my choice, my judgement, my learned behaviour. I learned to be homogenous, the same as everyone else, not to stand out.. because it would be lime He11

I'm in my emo era, I want to wear makeup so badly..I have the items..but I'm not confident enough to wear it out- like all goth and alternative like all these cool kids

I don't really want to live it out, I already dissected the meaning of life..and it's just making connections and 'enjoying' your personal life until back to work and 'enjoying your work too...for what? 80 years or something? EUTHANI1SE ME ALREADY

like kitchen work or whatever..tf, I'm gonna do 1 year by then..bcs I don't care abt doing a 2nd year.. I can't 

Bla bla bla who will employ me, bruh. I'm lowkey cooked

It doesn't excuse it, but hey, it's a cause 

That's so boring, no wonder people end up insane, or start attacking each other.

But just to be for real, their music kinda sucks..I'm so fr, like it's giving "failed 3rd gen group songs" like half their discography IS GIVING "recycled songs" like they couldn't be arsed to give them bangers, besides their title tracks and some songs.. the rest feel flat, messy, empty, and OLD. Is it not giving TRENDZ???? Like ik like 3 of them were in like 3rd gen - mix nine survival show type shi, but they could've done better. Their sound is so OLD, something 3rd gen bg stans would LOVE, especially Vagabond..istg.. like for a group that debuted in late 4th gen.. they're giving millennials, not gen z.. they're not following the trends, like they should. Eg. They're slow on picking up tik tok trends that cater towards international fanbases. LIKE??? HELLOOO??? THEY ARE NOT USING THEIR MIX NINE FAME TO THEIR POTENTIAL, AND NOT MARKETING THEM TO THEIR FULL POTENTIAL! THEY DON'T HAVE A USP, NO UNIQUE SELLING POINT. THEY JUST SEEM COPIED, SEEM OVERDONE. They don't have enough fans for a reason, yikes. I'm so fr, like fans have to spread it all..ughh. But I think some of the fans do, do a good job. 
            
            I have 0 faith in their company LOL, they're fending for themselves like the other nugu boy groups without anything interesting but their talents, NOT ENOUGH for a competitive market unfortunately. I also think trendz's personalities clash, they seem awkward with eachother. They seem too careful with eachother, like coworkers not friends.. for a group that values Friendz (their fans) I think they need to giggle more with eachother and like THEIR CHEMISTRY levels kinda suck, but they're trying ig and that's enough.. not really enough, but it's grand.. I guess. The editing on their videos feel bland too, like again, they're prolly broke af, but dang... no fun edits at all??? LOL, the fans do the editing.

I only liked them in 2023 when some random Irish person asked eunil? Was it? Idrm, it was a while ago to come to Ireland.
            
            They almost did, but they cancelled the concert because not enough ppl wanted it (and they marketed it as 18+ AND I WAS 17.. BRUHHH, I WAS SO MAD), but anyway, only 1 of them RECENTLY TURNED 18 SO WDYM ONLY OLDER FANS.. I was lowkey bawling my eyes out on the inside, like they almost took my first concert experience.. NAHHH, the universe said: GO SEE P1HARMONY INSTEAD, LOL. DON'T SUPPORT NUGUS.
            
            Anyways, that's when I listened to their music, learned their faces and names, and then fell off again, until I heard they're coming to LONDON on the day of my Leaving Cert exam.. OH GREAT. THANKS A LOT. So, I never ended up seeing this nugu  boy group. 
            
            Oh, I also forgot to mention, I also saw that Jongseob from p1harmony LOOKS like ra.L from trendz, like ra.L is 2 yrs older than him, but Jongseob's been in the industry since he was like 10 years old..but since ra.L was born first, shouldn't that mean he looks like ra.L? LMFAO. But then we saw Jongseob before ra.L, so... that's why I think people think that ra.L. looks like Jongseob, and that's lowkey why I DID gain an interest in trendz.