Floor

@SerPete You're welcome lol. Well I will continue to read then!

@ammichelle haha thanks.  great tips, by the way.  looking back,  I can see the difference between GRRM and my story in terms of POV. my characters weren't as centered as the various POVs in ASOIAF. (not sure where you are my story, but at the end, I played around with POVs. the second book changes POV as well)
            
            and yeah, there's a few things I should've explained better in the story.  but with my eagerness to write, I skip over details.   so far, the first chapter in the new series has more detail than THE BLACK GUILD has as a whole : )
            
            I'll post it later today, perhaps.

@SerPete Yep. I was a little confused at the beginning though, 'are they in the medieval side or modern or are they mixed?' but as i read on i began to understand more. My opinion would just be adding details of where they are, describe the environment and why they are at war with the V dude.  And I read once that whenever you focus on different characters, make it seem like the whole story is about them. It gives every person or creature its own life, not just an extra thought. But only if you want to, its pretty good as is for writing for fun. Good luck with the new one!