SupernaturalIsLife

So i slept over at my crushes house last night and we did normal things that we usually did, like cuddle and stuff, but this morning I saw a Pinterest thing and it's like: If it does not spark joy when you hold it then you should throw it away, and the dude who drew it was like: Hm(hugs self) goodbye(puts self into trash can). I was like mood and said imma go throw myself away and my crush said no and I asked why and she said because I sparked joy in her when she holds me and I'm like wot

My mom:(sees picture of me and my friend on Facebook)(jokingly) Next time you're with her steal that jacket
          
          Me:That's her girlfriends jacket
          
          My mom: Well then steal her girlfriends jacket.
          
          My brother: So she's gay?
          
          Me:no she's bi
          
          My mom: Wait isn't she too young to know? Isn't she like 12? Why does she even have a girlfriend?
          
          Me:(Is out as bi(even though I'm not but I thought I was so that's what I had told my mom) and just stares at her then goes inside)
          
          My thoughts: Bitch what the fuck

So my crush stayed the night again and She had my hand on her chest again and at one point of the night she was whispering to me to do something but I couldn't hear her and then I understood what she meant but I didn't know if that's what she meant and then she got super embarrassed when I asked what again and she said nevermind but later she actually asked(it was what I thought it was) and yeah.
          
          (~talks about self harm past here so if you don't like that don't read past this~)
          
          Also she found my razer blade and took it. I found it the first time and hid it again but then she found it I didn't get it back. She also found out the last time I cut and told me she used to but she hasn't done that in over 5 months. I was happy for her but sad at myself because the longest I was able to last since I started was 2(?) months.

So my parents don't want me to have sleepovers with boys but they are 100% fine with girls but they know that I'm not straight at all so I'm confusion. Like they don't know that I have a crush on one girl and they let her sleep over a bit but this one guy that comes over isn't allowed to stay past 8 or 9 so idk if my parents are 1) Think that the boy would try to get at me or 2) Think that I, for some reason, like the boy. Like bish I don't even like boys.

So my crush maybe likes me. She didn't tell me directly but a friend of me and her showed me something. At first it was just that my crush liked another girl. The dude took the phone away before I could read it but I got the phone and the texts went like this
          
          My crush: (Random girl) is quiet and always knows what to say and jayden likes to explore.
          
          The dude:Well how I see this you have two options, option a is to be with (random girl) and be quiet and stuff and option b is to be with jayden and do more things then you could with (random girl)
          
          My crush:well I don't really wanna date right now
          
          The dude:just saying.
          
          
          Also my crush said that I really calmed down and that's cool when she slept over.

So I had a friend over for a sleep over(I have a crush on her) and we were laying on my bed and I was kinda sitting and she said that she cuddled with this when she slept and started cuddling up on my leg. I'm pretty sure I was blushing. Later around 10 I was looking for another blanket so we didn't have to share and she said to just stop looking because she wanted to share a blanket. I lied down and she cuddled up to me and she had moved my hand onto her chest and I asked her why and she said she didn't know. My mom knows that I'm not straight and doesn't want me sleeping that close to anyone I invite over. Anyway I told the girl that I was gonna move away when she fell asleep. She didn't want me to move so she tried to stay awake. She usually hated people touching her hair but I ran my hand through it over and over and when I stopped she wound pout kinda. Around 2:30am we both fell asleep while cuddling and I woke up at around 4 and moved so my mom didn't get mad. I then took the girls flannel and wear it and she said I was cute in it. Then after she left she Snapchat-ed me and said she was bored and she had no one to cuddle. That night when we were cuddling she said she hadn't ever had sleep that close her cuddle her really even though she had an ex girlfriend.
          
          The question I am having is if she likes me or not. Like all my friends ship us and she blushes and one of my friends said she liked me but I'm like does she really or is she just a really good friend???

Where I live it's only supposed to get to 74 degrees Fahrenheit today. It's October 1st.

So there is a school shooter fake alarm, like we already know it's fake.
          
          So now that's that there me and my friends were playing Pumped Up Kicks and in 4th period a kid was singing it. Is that bad?

So I have a story.
          
          Today at school one of my teachers was doing this thing to not bully others. She had this paper at the end and it said "IALAC" standing for "I am lovable and capable". So any way she started ripping off small pieces and saying things that hurt her as a kid. At the end she had ripped all off and said that was when she was in highschool and she didn't believe that she was lovable or capable because her parents kicked her out for liking girls. Well her girlfriend at the time(at the the because they are married now, yay!) Her girlfriends parents were like "no, this is not good. Well we can't pay for everything but we could get you clothes and teach you how to drive." So my teacher had to work and go to school most days. And then my teacher became a teacher and yeah.
          
          Anyway at the end she gave us that paper and told us to design it like we want so we remember that we are lovable and capable. I did and I decorated it in PRIDE things, like rainbows, rainbow flowers, LGBT flags, you know things like that. Well this girl in my group was like "Is that gay things?" And I am like "no, totally not" and she believed and and said "Good, cuz gay people make me uncomfortable because mine and my mom's religion doesn't believe in gay people." And then says jokingly says "Please don't kill me". I just look at her and smile thinking 'bish wot the fuk'

Update on the fanfics/books in my library:
          
          I now have 61. I have read like 9. Oof.