The Majestic Beard is a collaboration of @TheMajesticMoose and @gorlogsbeard

SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION!!!!!!

"Frodo, I am your father." -Albus Dumbledore

"A wizard is never late, Frodo Baggins. Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to." -Gandalf the Grey

"I always hear 'Punch me in the face.' when you're speaking, but it's usually subtext." -John Watson to Sherlock Holmes

"You know what the chain of command is? It's the chain I go get and beat you with until you realize who's in ruttin' command here." -Jayne Cobb

"It is Rochefort who is the traitor. Rochefort who is the enemy. Rochefort who should be on trial." -Aramis

"Prince Humperdinck: To the death!
Westley: No! To the pain.
Humperdinck: I don't think I'm familiar with that phrase.
Westley: I'll explain and I'll use small words so you'll be sure to understand you warthog-faced buffoon.
Humperdinck: That may be the first time in my life a man had dared insult me.
Westley: Oh, it won't be the last. To the pain means the first thing you will lose will be your feet below the ankles. Then your hands at the wrists. Next your nose. 
Humperdinck: And then my tongue I suppose, I killed you too quickly the last time. A mistake I don’t mean to duplicate tonight. 
Westley: I wasn’t finished! The next thing you will lose will be your left eye followed by your right. 
Humperdinck: And then my ears, I understand let’s get on with it. 
Westley: Wrong! Your ears you keep and I’ll tell you why. So that every shriek of every child at seeing your hideousness will be yours to cherish. Every babe that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out, “Dear God! What is that thing,” will echo in your perfect ears. That is what to the pain means. It means I leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish misery forever."

Yay quotes!
 #teamjace