-- My mind probably merits a “radioactive” sign. Particles of insanity tend to leak out and infect others' minds.

--I’m not actually insane. Just ask my therapist.

--Did you know that 47% of people who say they aren’t insane are, in fact, insane?

--Did you know that 90% of statistics are made up?

Hi. I’m a college student who likes to read fantasy, science fiction, and just about any other genre he can get his hands on. He also likes to talk about himself in third person.

My favorite authors as of now are Edgar Allan Poe, J.R.R Tolkien, Stephen King, Piers Anthony, Christopher Paolini (Eragon), Ray Bradbury, and Arthur C. Clarke. 

Favorite movies? Doctor Horrible's Sing Along Blog. Look it up on Youtube. Also, Fiddler on the Roof makes me almost cry. Every time. 

I’m 19. I’m male. My pen name here is J.D. (Jonathan Daniel) Spender. I'm single and  heterosexual. Sorry, guys. Hello, ladies. 

No, I’m not gonna use Wattpad for romance. If you thought I was serious, my apologies for making a joke on a sensitive subject. I’m not as funny as I think I am.

Or am I? If I think I’m not as funny as I think I think I am, then I’m not very funny, so I must be as funny as I think I am. Paradox!

:)

I dislike emoticons. And hypocrites. So I’m a double hypocrite. 

As you can see, my stories were last updated in the early 17th century. I have not given up on Wattpad. I've just been busy reading the entire public library...don't worry though. Fresh updates are coming soon.
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Oh, and please, NO SMACKIN' SPAM! If you spam me unsolicited, you will spontaneously combust. Thank you.