˚｡⋆୨୧˚ᥡøsһkᥲ.ᐟ⋆. 𐙚 ˚

Ive had a ton of motivation recently that's awsome

how do I tell a self-centered *сука* not every thing is about them without coming off very rude
           
          (sorry for the random vent with absolutely no context about what the problem is, if I feel up to it I'll explain what I mean later today) 

uhhgghgh I HATE it when some random person in my classes just comes up to me and goes like... 
          
          " can you say something in Russian / Spanish??!1! 1! 1! "
          
          Like sorry no I will NOT be speaking Russian / Spanish for you, I am not your entertainment for gods sake.. just because I'm working on becoming fluent in Russian while also learning Spanish doesn't mean I've already got all of it down and ready to have full on conversations, and they don't even understand Russian or Spanish, so why does it matter yall??  And then they get all mad when I day no— like tf?? anyway. Ok I'm just rambling, sorry.. I'm not very sure how to get the point across it just it REALLY annoys me when that happens
          
          (happened to me 8 TIMES in a week, and yes I'm targeting this to the popular guys in my first and third period. Like stop askingg aughghgh— even if they absolutely will not be seeing this just thought I'd mention that) 

I love lasagna and I don't care if I should like garfield AT ALL saying this. it's so good yumyumyummyum

Woah look it's not me over here with my paragraphs I usually type out
          
          
          anyway, am I the only one who like,,, doesn't really know how kissing works? Like, French kissing for example, all that stuff. Idk how to do it or draw it. Sooo, I kinda feel like really awkward when someone is like "oh my God kissing omg" and I'm just sitting there like "uhm... Yep. ". I like romance, but holy you will not catch me participating in like that stuff, even if I'd like. ( #I'msoaroacebcwdymIwantmydatinglifetojustbe morelikealittleupstepfromfriendship) 
          
          (This was still long are you actually kidding me) 

Oh well guess who had writing today!!!! (or state testing) I mean.. Dont get me wrong, I love writing. (In fact I have a few fan fictions / original storylines I'm planning on working on. I just need to get past this stress of a time, improve my writing, ect ect. For my age I guess I could say I'm a pretty strong writer? I don't know if I could really classify it as that, it's just I feel like I'm basically a fetus on the internet.. It sucksss like a lot. Luckily, I'm smart enough to NOT share my personal information to strangers on the internet, so I won't be discussing me age, or something. ) it's just.. The topic wasn't my cup of tea,, like I had to look over / read these two articles about inventors or something on the lines of that.. Then write an informative topic about it. Personally, I very much prefer to write my own storyline, and it be a narrative type writing, I think it's just way more fun. but yeahh, sorry for school lore drop I guess? 
          
          Oh and not to mention,, I know no one gets notifications about these or anything, but apologies for posting this at such UNGODLY hours. (like I post most all my rants..) tbh I shouldn't be staying awake rn BC I have testing tomorrow as well, and the following day, then the day after that.. Then even some of next week— but ehh idrc.. 

vro I need to stop using this comment thing as a freaking PUBLIC VENTING SPACE THAT NO ONE SEES like self this is not YOUR DIARY Anyway I'm gonna probably mostly use this as random updates or something,, maybe I'll keep up with whatever crazy rants thing I got going on rn— my impulsive 3am sleep deprived brain is just wanting to say this but realizing how actually hesitate we are so hold on

Auhhggg NOO state testing starts not this upcoming week but next week,, NOOO I'M COOKED 
          
          hahaha ok sorry this is so short I don't feel like writing a whole like essay like I usually do bc it's like 2am where I live (we still refuse to go to sleep though out of pure boredom and that to start out with our sleep schedule already sucks, that's fun, oh we are gonna hate this tomorrow morninggg— Anyway ok bye,, AND I STILL SOMEHOW WRITE A HECK TON WITHOUT EVEN MEANING TO.. I YAPPPPP— sorry ig) 

I wanna read projects a.l. again bc it's rly good and I like re reading / watching things I really like,, only thing is that EVERY time I read it I get emotional. LIKE TF?? vro that fan fiction has me in a Chokehold istg.
          
          -----completely different rant sorry I got off track-----
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          ╰┈➤Bc what do you mean suddenly from a random fan fiction I unlock my emotions like out of no where?? Where were yall??  I mean don't get me wrong I wasn't completely emotionless before, it's just from trauma Ive had in my life it's affected my sympathy— (I'm not gonna go into depth about my trauma but basically it was being a victim of cocsa at age 8, basically all of my life my dad having cancer and dying when I was just hitting pre-teen age and I felt emotionally neglected most my life so I've just not really bothered with strong emotions—) like I guess maybe I'm just going through stages of grief?? But uhm like why is it that like out of the blue my emotions just pop up like
          
          "HIII *deadname* !!!!! We're finally here even though you've had dry emotions for (my current age) years!!!!!! Sorrrryyyy we're late and sorry for our timing— of popping up IN THE MIDDLE OF A FAN FICTION<333 aren't we so awesome??? "
          
          like what. Huh. either way I guess I'm happy to have like actual emotion and not just feel like a teen that is probably in need of mental hospital time. It's just weird and stuff

Auuauahahggg I want to make a fan fiction (like yoshka x kratcy or smth bc there is basically nothing of them and like I wanna provide good fan fiction to those like me who can't find ANYTHING of them on here) but I feel like my writing would SUCKK.. Like I'd probably just ramble and quite frankly, I SUCK at making romance in the first place.. sooo. IF I GET MOTIVATED SOME DAY I MIGHT SEE IF I CAN IMPROVE MY WRITING SKILLS (it's already ok I guess just not good enough for others to just read without dying of cringe and bad grammar) ANNNDD WRITE FANFICS!! YAYAYAYAYYY