Hi, I'm Sam. Well, actually I'm not, but that's what a lot of people call me. What even is a name though? It's really just some vibrations our voice box makes that we label ourselves by. Ah, yes, that complication of random noises out of your mouth, that's exactly what I'm going to make my child respond to for the rest of their life.

But then one could argue that all words are exactly the same. Who went around making language? Who decided to start turning those sounds into squiggles on a page? Who thought is would be best to put all the possible combinations into thin pieces of tree flesh? Probably someone named Collins.

Dear Merlin, is that the time? I should be asleep... and then awake in like 2 hours... oops