stubborn ;
i hope you feel it. i hope you feel every little bit of feeling that i felt when you did what you did. i hope your next chooses others over you. i hope you get to be put second choice. i hope that once everything that you did to me happen to you. i hope you realise. that you put me through this hell. i hope your next moves on faster than you could ever imagine. and i hope you feel pain because of it. i hope that you see that i treated you to the best of my abilities, even while you treated me as the second choice. i hope you regret it. and more importantly i hope you long for me after. i hope you miss me. my touch, my care, my kiss. and i hope you do what i nvr did. i hope you come back for me. a text, a call. anything to salvage even just the crumbs of what is left between us. i hope to hear from you again. i hope to get back what was once i used to call 'us'. but ik you wont do that, your too stubborn to listen, to talk to. too stubborn to try again. thats you. never admitting when your wrong. never knowing when its time to give in. i hope you fight your hardest for your next rs. maybe then you will realise and feel the exhaustion i felt.
idw to keep on doing this. writing to you. its stupid. you never read it. and i write for nothing. i hate that its like this. im always chasing. its a vicious cycle and i hate it. its just pain over and over again. ik theres only one way for me to end the cycle. and that would be to stop writing, thinking and crying about you. what? what are you going you say abt me crying abt you. are you gonna call me obsessive again? just bc i couldnt move on? your pathetic. im worse. pls take care of yourself and study hard. swim like your life depends on it if you must. i wish you all the best. and i hope, that you wont be too late.
-- once yours,, 20/10/22
