famechased

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           not    these    candies.     i've    been    meaning    to    eat    them    for    / weeks. /     this    may    be    my    only    chance!

your  things  are  my  things.   meaning  your  candies  are  my  candies.

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           you    have    zero    proof    of    that    at    all.     uh,     not    my    candies.     i    just    opened    those.

guilty  as  charged.  what  can  i  say?   i  look  for  you  in  everyone,  babe. 

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           someone    who    dresses    like    me?      gee,     i    knew    you    were    obsessed    with    me,     but    this    is    a    whole    other    level.

yeah  exactly.   that’s   what  i  want.   someone who  isn’t  super  …  like  someone  who  dresses  like  you!

then  we  can  go  on   a  fancy  dinner  date.   i’ll  pay.  

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           but    you    already    got    all    dolled    up.     would    suck    for    all    this    to    go    to    waste.

i’ll  text  her  and  reschedule!   it’s  not  the  end  of  the  world.   i  don’t  wanna  go.  i  just  wanna  stay  in  with you.  ):

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           yeah,     yeah,     i'll    do    my    best.     but    im    not    gonna    guarantee    anything.

promise?  i  want  you  two  to  get  along. 

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           its    fine.     my    point    stands    either    way.     i'll    try    not    to    be    mean    to    him.

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           but    you    also    just    used    it    as    an    insult    against    me.

i  like  it.  i  thought  that  was  obvious.

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           your    feelings    regarding    me   being    an    overachiever.

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           freakiness    isn't    genetic,     dumbass.     anything    else    as    backup?     i dunno    if    i    can    do    garlic    bread    right    now.

it’s  in  my  dna.  i  can’t  turn  it  off.   unmm.  garlic  bread  would  be  pretty  fire. 

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           entertain    yourself    by    not    being    a    freak    for    more    than    two    seconds.     lasagna    it    is.     anything    else    you    want?

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           if    im    mean,     it's    cause    you're    stupid.

your  face  is  pretty  cute.   but  you  thin  it  sometimes  by  being  mean. 

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           debatable.     me    being    mean    isn't    cute?     then    what're    you    still    doing    around?     what    / is /    cute    to    you?

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           i    told    you    i    would    visit    him!     we    didn't    / plan /    to    do    karaoke.     we    just..     did    it.     i    thought    it    would    help    him    let    it    out    or    something.

whatever.    i   don't  care.     you  didn't  even  /tell/   me  you  were  going  out!

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           at    least    hear    me    out!     it    wasn't    karaoke    just    to    do    karaoke!     he    was..     severely    depressed    and    heartbroken,     okay?

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           do    you    / really /    want    me    to    smack    it    with    a    shoe    right    here?

i  feel  like  that's  not  true.   those  bitches  are  like—  they  don't   die.   just   smack  it  with a  shoe!

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           [     he    takes    the    paper,     careful    as    he    slides    it    under    the    cup.     ]     im    gonna    throw    it    outside.     it'll    die    from    the    height.

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           if    they    don't    want    to,     one    of    us    can    go    on    our    own    and    we    play    a    broke    roommates    situation.     which    isn't    far    off.     see    if    that    works.

wait.   would  they  even  give  two  dudes a   kid?  that  feels  like  something  the  government  wouldn't   do. 

@sublives ⋆｡°✩           okay.     then    we    can    look    into    adoption.     problem    solved.     you    get    your    baby.