@gopaperbackwriter
Hahahahah.
I woke up to 25 notifications.
I was soooo effing excited!
I've never gotten that many before.
Yeah, someone updated a bunch of chapters of their story last night.
They weren't for me.
I was just realizing...was my little wxtra story, "If Gavin Died" on here before?
Because if so, where the fvck did it go??
I feel like I published it here before.
I'm so confused.
Seriously! I've read some actually horrible stories, with millions of reads, and I'm like....REALLY?
Maybe there's just not enough Ed fans. Which is fine. More of him for me. Lol! (Ok, and I guess a little for you too!)
@edsheeranfanficts I got the first of 12 chapters up of "If Gavin Died", if you're bored. I know...you didn't like Nate trying to be all up in Gavin and Gwen's bizznit. But I had a soft spot for him, so that's why I wrote this. I wondered where it would go, and I didn't know, until I started writing.
I have one half way written, and I keep wanting to finish it, but then I start wondering why, when the ones I already wrote were hardly ever read. No one noticed them and they never took off.
They've been sitting here collecting dust, actually! No reads at all for months.
It makes me have no motivation. At all. :(
But having at least ONE person giving me motivation helps greatly! Perhaps for YOU, I'll try and finish.
I tell ya...the things I do for all my fan! (Notice no "s" on the end of "fan"! Lolololol.)
Thanks for remembering me and my stories. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and happy.
Oh, I also have an alternate/side story sort of thing for Cross My Heart. I have to finish editing it...
It's called "If Gavin Died".
It's what would happen between Gwen and Nate, if Gavin (Ed) had actually died when he got shot in "Cross My Heart". (If you remember, he tried to make sure Gwen and Nate got together so they could be happy after he died, because Nate loved her so much.)
So this short, but intense-ish story is how they deal with Gavin's death and if they get together or not.
I'll get to work on those. You're such a slave driver! :)
(Ok, I love it.)
Oh I'm sure plenty of people have reasons. Life happens! But some people abandon their stories for years, even!
It's just frustrating. There's some really great stories out there (my library is full of them!) with no endings!
I always have to mentally make my own to give myself closure! Lol.
I actually try to only read completed stories, so I'm not sure how all these half finished ones keep getting through! They're sneaky!
What's up with people who write an awesome story, then never come back to complete it??
I was just reading ANOTHER great one, only to realize they haven't updated since October.
Really?
I have SOOOOO many stories I'm waiting for updates to in my library now, I forget what they're all about. It seriously ruins a story, people! When you don't update in forever! Sometimes I simply delete them and forget them.
I can't get a single reader with my FINISHED stories, but yet these people get thousands...even millions?
*sigh*
Ooh!! Remember that time I wrote stories and no one read them?
Me too.
Lol.
Unhappiness:
When you read other's stories on #wattpad and see the writer beg people to vote and comment, saying "If I get 500 votes, I'll update"....and she gets over 1000 instead.
Meanwhile, your own stories sit in a lonely desert somewhere, with tumbleweeds blowing through them in perfect silence and invisibility. Your characters all grew up, had kids, grandkids and DIED, and after months and months, you have 1000 reads and 100 votes.
THAT is unhappiness.
Hey, anyone wanna read my stories? The few people who did read them said they were great, so....yeah. If yer bored, I mean...
Anyone?
I'll just...be right...here....
*taps foot*
Why won't anyone read my stories?
I'm having a weak, sad moment right now, knowing that my one of two total readers of my latest story, is almost done reading it. After that...there will be no read notification alerts to make me smile. Make me get out of bed.
I gave up on the fourth story I was working on because...it's too time consuming for no reason.
I'm just having a good cry right now, because someone has to pity me, and when you have no one, you look online. But when you're lonely and ignored online too...you realize ya gotta just support yourself. I don't know what I'm doing wrong compared to all the other stories I've read, some that was way worse than mine, with a million reads. (??)
I made a tumblr. I made a twitter. I promote my stories. I chat in the clubs.
But yet...I'm as invisible here as I am in real life. And escaping real life is why I came here in the first place!!
My one reader at the moment can't truly know how much I appreciate her. She's funny. She's honest. I like her. Her votes/comments make me smile. {she's edsheeranfanficts!}
I guess my stories will fade out and sit here in a deserted waste land for forgotten stories. But I'll know that I tried. I guess that means something. Not that it feels any better.
:(