I started to love again, and I'm afraid of this. But the hatred towards everyone and the false feelings and false words were destroying me. I tried to express my feelings, to be colder, to gain the trust of others for pure personal satisfaction, I hated myself and my sensitivity. I began to love again and I began to appreciate myself. I don't know how long it will last, but if before I was hoping for a quick end and hoping to disappear... now I found a...uhm I don't know,I'm complicated, but I almost don't mind