@persassyfan07 My advice would be to try and show, not tell. For example instead of saying "I have a tiny crush on Percy but nobody knows" say something like "I saw Percy and my cheeks flushed red, I'm glad no-one saw."
It would also be good if you could add some more dialogue.
I really like the concept of this fanfiction, can't wait to see where it goes. I am a sucker for percabeth lmao.