Mel, tell your friend that we, all of us, have her back, even if we don't know her, because she didn't deserve for that to happen. Tell her she deserves to be happy, and she should forget him.
Tell William that I wish a could give him a dilophosaurus in his mail, and I hope that he feels Nicholas Cage's eyes everywhere he goes. And most of all, I hope he feels the power of sisterhood. He's never living this down, and we will never let it go.