@xDadJokesx
You know, people say they pick their nose, but I feel like I was just born with mine.
@xDadJokesx That was terrible babes
@xbloody-armsx HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
@xDadJokesx "I picked my pxnis."
patton was cowarding under a table, eyes fixed on an eight-legged monster. everytine it moved, he jumped back and hit his head. "go awayyy," he told it, swinging his shoe at it. patt never actually hit it, scared it'd survive and want revenge.
@xSlimySnakeyBoix The spider moved towards Janus, and Patton jumped back. "It's attacking," he whispered.
@xDadJokesx “Are you trying to steal my job?” Janus said looking at the spider
@xSlimySnakeyBoix "...i fell?" he raised an eyebrow, eyes flicking to the spider as he made sure it hadn't moved.
why is peter pan always flying? because he neverlands :D
why is gaston the most peaceful disney villain?
because he won the no-belle prize.
can february march? no, but april may!
ooh!! want to hear a joke about a piece of paper?
never mind... it's tearable. c:
@xDadJokesx I NEEDED THIS AND I LOVE YOU!
happy national dog day ! now i know some of you kiddos are going into school, so have some (amazing) jokes to cheer you up!
say, what happens when it rains cats and dogs?
you might step in a poodle!
what do you call a dog with no legs?
it doesn’t matter! he still won’t come when you call.
why did the snowman name his dog “frost”?
because he bites!
@xbloody-armsx he moved away, "that's not what i meant!"
@xDadJokesx Remus chuckles patting Patton on the back proudly.
@xbloody-armsx "what? no!"
“Hey Dad!”
@xSlimySnakeBoix "maybe you should try a monocle."
@xDadJokesx “That’s the 4th time this week! And it’s Tuesday!”
@xSlimySnakeBoix he nodded, "probably."
"PATTON YOU'RE THE BEST DAD AND I LOVE YOU! Also, you want some coffee?"
@xDadJokesx "Perfect."
@xStarbucks-N-Sleepx he grabbed a few journals and stacked them on top of the stain.
@xDadJokesx "...or that."
Remus enters Patton's room "Hello Patton, I have something to show you!" Remus grabs a chalkboard and starts scratching it while laughing maniacally.
@xDadJokesx Remus left the room in defeat, as he plugged in his headphones.
@xbloody-armsx @xStarbucks-N-Sleepx he shrugged, "see kiddo?" |( aw. thanks :3 )|
@xDadJokesx @xbloody-armsx "YOU KNOW I WILL!" (I agree, you don't suck!)
"Pat!"
@xDadJokesx "True."
@xStarbucks-N-Sleepx "I still think you should get more sleep.."
@xDadJokesx "Awww Patton! You don't need to worry about me. I'm a tough coffee-addicted lord of sleep, I'll be fine."