Indulgence [h.s]

𝟮

** when you see these asterisks, click the sound above to go with the scene :)

***

Fuck I forgot today was moving day. I looked at the clock, noticing the time was 10:47 AM. "Shit!" I yelled out, knowing the movers were supposed to be here at 1:30 PM. I start to scramble around my apartment, grabbing as many boxes as I can and trying not knock over the cereal boxes and milk cartons. I knew moving day was upon us, but time these days moves so quickly that I lost track of the time in my life.

"What are you doing?" Kaia asks, being completely slumped back on the couch, still sensing that she still feels like shit. "Kaia, we are moving to New York today. I completely forgot and the movers will be here at 1:30 PM" I blurt out, trying to rush throughout each of the rooms, packing little knick knacks, putting dishes in boxes with bubble wrap so they don't shatter.

I knew that we should have prepared for this day, but Kaia and I were stressed from this week because we are moving to a completely new city. I've never left Toronto in my life and I've been dreading moving. I've always hated change, and today was no different. I just had to swallow the nervous lump in my throat and leave the city i've lived in for my entire life, but I wanted and desperately needed a new change of pace, and New York would definitely provide me that change I needed.

"Jade!" Kaia snaps at me, trying to get my attention. I always get lost in thought and zone out, people usually have to get my attention for me to come back to reality. "Sorry, I zoned out again" I mutter out, starting to sift through the packed items in boxes as I start to move throughout the apartment to finish up packing. I start to grab clothing from my closet and dresser, packing them into boxes for the movers to bring to our new apartment.

*****

After about two hours of quickly packing up our apartment, all of the boxes we purchased were filled with our valuables and the only things left were our beds that the movers would disassemble, the TV's we had in our living room and bedrooms, and the couch and coffee table in the living room. Once we finished, I wanted to take a second with Kaia and walk outside to enjoy the city for one last time, knowing we won't be back for a good amount of time.

As we stepped out from our apartment into the crisp, cool, October Toronto air, we looked at the building we lived in for the past three years. Tears started brimming in my eyes but I hold them back, trying not to cry in front of Kaia. I've always hated sharing my emotions, even with the closest people in my life. I try to stay strong for those who I love and care about, so emotions aren't really my 'thing'.

"Hey Jade," Kaia says to me, nudging my arm to signal for me to look at her. "This is a good thing I promise. You've always talked about living in another city and I know that movement in life scares you, but I promise that this move will be for good" Kaia says sincerely, pulling me into a hug.

Kaia's demeanor calmed my anxiety, making me feel more at peace than I was five minutes ago. I just hope I can make some new friends in New York. I heard the people there are not the nicest and that scares me, but thank god I have Kaia by my side. I'm so excited for our new experiences in the big apple.

"Is Zayn going to be okay without you?" Kaia adds. "Yeah he'll be okay, he's planning to move to New York in a couple months, he wanted to stay in Toronto until he graduated from highschool. He has his friends around him to support him and he has my cell number so if he needs to call me for anything, i'm always here for him". As we walked out onto the sidewalk I've stood on more times than I can count, we reminisced about the memories we had together in our old apartment, weaving in and out of the way of the moving company.

As soon as the movers finished packing up the apartment, Kaia and I hopped into my car and turned on the ignition, hearing the sputtering and the roar of the engine. I connected my phone to my bluetooth car radio as we started our trek to New York. I took a deep breath, trying to calm my anxiety and lower the lump in my throat. I could feel the nervousness in the pit of my stomach and I feel like I could throw up at any second. Kaia grabs my hand and squeezes it, letting me know everything is okay.

**As we start to drive off from Toronto, I shuffle my driving playlist and Devil's Advocate by the Neighbourhood starts to play through the speakers.** Both of us smile at each other, knowing this is one of our favorite songs. I focus on the road, driving along the paved asphalt roads that were so familiar to me as we start to escape the city we've known for so long.

"I love you Jade and everything is going to be okay, I will be here if you need anything" she says as she looks at me, her soft eyes letting me know everything will be okay.

"I love you too Kaia, thank you for everything you do for me" I say, smiling softly. As we start to merge onto the highway towards New York, I focus on the road, thinking to myself. Maybe i'll meet someone special in the city that'll change my life for the better. My last relationship was a crock of shit, but I treated him like a fucking angel who floated down from heaven. Maybe that's why I have issues in relationships. I put my trust into another person's hands way too quickly, and it bites me in the ass later. Anyways, I've learned that all men are trash and all you need in life is your best girl friends and some good music and you're set.

At this very moment, we are singing at the top of our lungs, feeling like we are 17 again. "I'm the devil's advocate, you don't know the half of it, good luck trying to manage it, if a God is a dog and a man is a fraud, then I'm a lost cause."

As we get further and further away from the skyline, I look in my rearview window, staring at the city I love so very much. I start to tear up, knowing i'll miss the city very much, but at this very moment, i'm jamming out with my best friend, loving these moments cause it's when we both can just be ourselves.

I'll catch you later Toronto, this isn't the last i've seen from you.

***

i will most likely update by the end of the week, merry christmas and i'll see y'all soon !!