Unbreak My Heart (18+, ManxMan)

Chapter 10 Serenity Now

Chapter 10 

Finn

"What are you doing here?"  Benji  asked me groggily.  I was laying down across from him as we faced each other on his and Ajax's bed.

"I got home a little while ago and Ajax came downstairs when he heard me.  He said you were sick and you had some kind of a panic attack or something? He asked me to stay with you while he started dinner.  He didn't want you to wake up alone…so here I am."

"Oh."

"I have a feeling I know why you panicked," I suggested.

"I'm sorry Finn."  

Benji's eyes started to look glassy and I knew I was right about why he panicked.

"It's okay…I'm actually glad you did it.  Some warning may have been good though."

"How did it go?"

"We were both shocked at first…we didn't talk a long time, but we're getting together for lunch tomorrow.  I needed to clear my head, so much stuff was bouncing around my brain at once."

"That's good right?  I mean, you're going to talk more?"

"I think so."

"Does…does Ajax know?"

"No, I didn't tell him and Nico said he wouldn't.  I figured it was you and also that you'd be freaking out."

"You know me so well," he grinned.

"But he'll have to find out eventually Benji."

"I know…and I'll be the one to tell him…just not today, okay?  I'm kind of wrecked from my panic attack…I was so worried about you, about what might happen…and Ajax getting mad."

"I know, and it's okay.  No matter what happens I won't blame you.  I need to talk to him, I need some answers for closure."

"Closure?"

"Closure on the past, on what happened.  So I can put it behind me once and for all."

"Oh…okay."  Benji looked confused.

"Did you think we're just going to get back together because I'm old enough now?"

"I don’t know…"

"I can't even think that way…and I can't go back to the way things were.  I'm a different person now."

"I know…I just…I don’t know what I thought would happen.  I just thought you needed to see him…and he needed to see you too, he's been like a recluse on that boat ever since Miami.  I only just saw him for the first time and he looked…so sad and wrecked."

"Yeah, he doesn't look like the old Nico for sure…maybe he needs some closure too."

"Thanks Finn…for not telling Ajax.  I don't want to lie to him, but I just need a day or so to get my head straight and I'll tell him for sure."

"Okay, Benj.  Do you want to go downstairs now and see what Ajax is making for dinner?"

"Yeah…I'm just going to go to the bathroom and wash my face.  I'll meet you down there in a few minutes."

"I'll suggest that Ajax wait a day before he tries to talk to you, I'm sure he won't want to push you right now anyway."

"Okay.  Thanks Finn, I love you man!"  Benji lunged forward and gave me a big hug and I felt the relief flowing off him, poor guy.