Zeno's Sapphire

Chapter

"Son, what's the meaning of this?"

Tamad akong napatingin sa magulang ko ng maglatag sila sa harap ko ng papel, malamang ay galing sa school.

"A complaint maybe," saad ko.

Walang emosyon ang ama kong nakatingin sa akin. Samantalang si mama ay napapikit saglit at umayos muli ng upo.

"Why are you being seen with different boys? Wala kang narinig sa amin nang dahil sa bakla ka pero huwag mo sirain ang reputasyon mo kakapalit ng iba't ibang lalaki," Mom said.

I waited for my Dad to say something pero hindi siya nagsalita. He was just observing me kaya tumikhim na ako, "You told me I can be gay as long as I don't let weakness creep on me?"

"And cheating?" tanong uli ni Mama.

I sighed, "I don't cheat. I break up with them even before meeting another boy," simpleng paliwanag ko.

Maayos pa rin ang tindig kong kausap sila, katulad nila. I was raised being formal as we always get to be in the circle of biggest people in the industry. As long as I get my studies good and didn't break my stance, they let me be a gay.  I never failed to do it not until I entered highschool.

Who can resist boys, pag sila na mismo ang lumalapit sayo? But I know they all know me because of my image, ang akala ba nila ay isa akong baklang madadala sa mga pangisi-ngisi nila? I can do that, too.

"Go change boyfriends, however you like. But once you graduate, prove yourself to us. You're going to college at your mom's country," Dad said with finality.

And I agreed. Hindi ko maman sineryoso ang pakikipagrelasyon sa mga lalaki noong highschool, I just go with dates and flirt with them hanggang doon lang. I don't trust their bodies too para gawin ko iyon sa kanila. I want to keep myself clean, like my mom always remind me.

"Ang dami na naging boyfriend niyan! Mas gwapo pa nga siya sa mga iyon e, kaya rin siguro papalit-palit dahil naboboringan sila sa kilos niya,"

Schoolmates love to talk of how I am, maybe these girls are just insecure that I can attract their boys with my "boring" stance. I don't agree though I just know how to act with discipline, aside from well boys.

"Kuya Zeeeen!"

Nginitian ko ang batang pinsan kong si Lea nang salubungin ako nito pagkababa ko ng hagdan.

"You're gonna leave?"

"Yes, Lea. I need to study abroad," Ginulo ko ang buhok niya at yinakap ito. "Zen will miss his favorite cousin,"

"Ako lang naman ang pinsan mong nandito e," sagot naman sa akin nito. I chuckled, it's true.

All I did when I entered college in France is to focus on my study. I stop with boys because I'm done with that phase, it's time to achieve my dream and prove my Dad what I can do.

My journey didn't came easy but it was all worth it when I finally graduated. My parents did came to see me and ask me to work for the company already but I declined, this is not how will it goes.

For the first two years I worked as free lance artist to companies around to have my own money besides the fund given to me and if course, experience. I attented programs that can certify me to teach and that's when I started teaching at the university as a mentor.

"Let me give you a freehand exercises first since most of you haven't been able to try it out with different fabrics," The first thing I  announced after meeting one of my class for my second year of teaching.

Nagtaas naman ng kamay ang isa kong estudyante. I blankly stare at him before signing him to proceed to what will he say, "What if I already knew that?  I can go advance, right?"