𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞 //𝚋𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚒𝚎 𝚎𝚒𝚕𝚒𝚜𝚑//

𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐯𝐞.

⚠️trigger warning: mentions of self-harm⚠️

It started when I was 13. I started to hate everything. I hated going outside. I hated the sun. I hated my family but most importantly I hated me. I barely ate mostly because I forgot but I didn't care. I was fat anyway. I would barely get any sleep. I stood up trying to distract myself. It was crazy how I was able to get no sleep still function properly and sleep for 12+ hours and wake up tired.

I lost motivation for everything but had to pretend like I didn't. If I told my mom it would be taken as an excuse not to work.

I always heard about it. Self-harm. I've thought about it before. I remember being visibly disgusted by the simple thought of getting cut and then bleeding. That was so long ago. I thought about it once everything was getting worse. I thought it would help and that's when it started. They were baby cuts that I placed on my arms but that stopped working so I moved to my thighs. It never went farther than that until it completely stopped. Well, it didn't stop completely I still had no motivation but everything else stopped. I'm 17 now and it starting to get bad again